Guilt is such a heavy burden to carry. The “what ifs” are endless and torturous. You are still Danny’s mum even though he’s no longer here and that will remain a constant for you although i’m sure it seems a much lonelier place right now. Trying to comprehend our time apart from our darling sons seems like an impossible task because we were never prepared to live in a world without them.
I often wonder how i get through some days carrying pain that i didnt know existed. I have to go on with a life i know that was taken from James. The unbearable pain cannot be for nothing.
I was James’s biggest supporter, he made my heart swell with joy. We talk all the time, i look at his pictures and i know that James is now my biggest supporter.
Take one day at a time.
Sending all my love to you at such a heartbreaking time. xx
The sun shone today and I missed Danny so so much.That I am here and he isn’t is bewildering .
My whole purpose in life since his father died was to keep him safe and for him to enjoy his life.
I have lost my purpose.I am grief stricken and every day brings challenges that before I lost Danny I could have dealt with.
Now I have no bravery nor strength to strive on.
I miss him so very much and I am lost.
You are facing the hardest journey ever and after 8 months you are still dealing with such challenges. Your bravery sings to me. You have a strength that you cant see. I never believed that such pain existed until i lost my James, every day is a battle. I’m so sad for James he deserved a wonderful with the sun shining on him and i owe it too him to not give up.
You are braver than you think and continue to face such heartbreak as Dannys mum. Im sure he would be so proud. x