@Enorac
Yes, you are right just remember the good times, any bad times are best forgotten.
We would all like to turn the clocks back and maybe do things differently, but we can’t do that.
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I have no guilt because he knew how much I loved him . I called him that fateful morning to tell him as always I loved him. I never imagined I would get a call a few hours later to tell me he had suddenly collapsed and died . I was truly horrified stood at the edge of Benidorm beach . I wanted to die too then and there but I had my son to think about so I didn’t I flew home as quick as I could . I will love him always he must know that
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That must have been traumatic happening that way. I wish I had told my husband but we didnt instead I wrote him cards and so did he. I still have them. I called him and said I missed him when he was in intensive care and he said he was glad to hear it.
But last time i spoke to him they were taking out his life support and he seemed not to realize it meant he would die.
Suppose just as well.
But he fell out of bed and had his breakfast and died. They said there was no going back. Just came to the end. He had tried his best in his own way. I guess he just lost his strength. He was 76 and three quarters. Same age as his mother was when she died. People said he lived to a decent age. Some would say every year over 70 is a bonus. Others say could expect ten years longer. No guarantees.
Hospital said he was old
in their terms. People say things and all feel awful at the time.
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I came back home to find my partner dead on the kitchen floor. I had been away for a couple of days cleaning and prepping a flat I owned so a relative could move in. We had argued a lot that week and I should have come back after one night but had a lot to do. I only had a brief conversation with him that day and I was short with him on the phone. I am now eaten with guilt and my heart is breaking. I can see no way through this. He was a good person, he deserved someone better than me. It has broken me thinking he died all alone. I just pray it was quick.
I read what you said about how your husband died and that is exactly exactly like how my mother died. I feel bad about it as well. Although it is 29 year’s ago. I regret not getting to the hospital on time when i had the phone call. I wrote a letter to my husband after he died. He of course won’t know. I hope in time you feel ok about it.
My husband Philip died in the hospice at 8.04pm. I had been at his side constantly for 10 months at home and the hospital following his aortic rupture surgery. The afternoon he died I had to go to the GP to get my meds. I told him as I left at 4pm that it was okay if he wanted to slip away when I was gone. Our daughter sat with him from 6pm to give me a chance to sleep. It was she who called me at 8.15 to say he had gone as she held his hand. Despite my giving him ‘permission’ to go I felt terrible guilt for months that I should have been there. We were married 50 years, but I too believe he chose his time to leave.