Hello. I am new here and I am very sorry for your loss. I lost my husband 10 months ago and I am still struggling with everything. He went to work and never came back. He was fine and had no complaints and only to suddenly pass from chest pain in less than 3 hours. He was 56 at the time and we had so many plans but they disappeared like magic.
3 Likes
Welcome Sheri. Hopefully this site will help you deal with your grief. It helps to have a space where everyone understands what you are going through. Xx. Sandra
1 Like
Thank you, it is not easy. I read others writing they feel lost so am l. I am looking forward to learn from how others do it.
2 Likes
Just onload your feelings on this site. It just helps. And knowing someone else is there and understands
1 Like
@Scoobydoo1 Iām doing ok today thx. Like you, Iāve been busy distracting myself. Some times it works, sometimes it doesnāt. Hope youāre having a better day
1 Like
I am glad to hear you are doing well today, I have good and bad days. I donāt know if you or anyone experiences it, my heart hurts so much sometimes that itās hard to breathe. I have had pain in my life but this pain is different. I lost my father 11 years ago but the pain was different. I am glad I am here and can learn coping mechanisms from others.
2 Likes
I lost all of my close family but the pain I am experiencing now is completely different and more intense. Six months and four days now and still getting worse instead of getting better or easier. There is a kind of acceptance now and still - when I hear the trains, I think my beloved husband is on his way back to me. My neighbour asked me if I want to move but I really do not want because of the location of the house and of course all our lovely memories together. And a move would not change anything because my husband is still not coming back and his urn is still in our bedroom. Sending love and hugs.
2 Likes
I am truly sorry for your loss, I hope as others say it will get better. I hope it may come one day the peace and calm. I can relate when you want to be in your home you shared with him my family didnāt understand at first but they meant well. They were only trying to protect me from the pain, not knowing with them or at home the pain is the same. At home I would wait to hear him open the door but it was just a wish and I would cry as much as I wanted. I wish we have more better days but it does not mean we have forgotten them when it is calm. I hope you have a better day.
1 Like
Are the tablets helping? Iāve had a lot of counselling and it helps but Iām still finding it tough. I lost my husband at the end of Feb last year after a short illness. Weād been a couple for 60 years. My heart broke
1 Like
It is truly heartbreaking to lose a loved one ad it is hard to accept the reality that they are gone. I have a lot of pain in my chest and the Dr told me it heartbreak. I also had a bit of counselling, it helped. The process was trying to get me to acceptance, reality and learning to live with the new normal. It is the hard truth that I am struggling with.
1 Like
I just started taking the tablets and I was told that it will take a while before I really can benefit from it. But so far they do calm me down a bit already. I hope that I soon can start with counseling. Sending love and hugs.
Hi Sandra, the sadness and despair comes in short waves now. I am crying and I am sad and in pain and then it stops. Might be the tablets kicking in? Still have no plans for my future without my beloved husband but maybe everything is too early anyway and I expect too much too soon. It is now six months and five days that I am truly on my own. There is a kind of acceptance now and yet I am still waiting for him to come home although his urn is in our bedroom. It is a mixed bag of feelings and hopefully, the counseling will help me to see a clearer picture of what to do next. I am on a waiting list for Mind Thurrock. And my birthday is coming up (26th of August, I will be 63). I was always looking forward to the long Bank Holiday with my husband but now I dreaded it. The pity is that I am not living in a nice area, so pleasant walks through a nice park or woods are out of the question. I am wishing you a peaceful and good weekend. Sending love and hugs.
1 Like
Hi, i know how youāre feeling my husband had chest pains and had a heart attack at work we sat with him at hospital 4 days. Im missing him so much he passed 5th September 2022 Iām so lonely and crying not knowing what to do.
3 Likes
Dear Bonn, You come to the right place. We all experience the pain of losing our loved ones and how lonely this journey is. I found a lot of support in this forum and hope it will help you as well. Do you have any support? I am on the waiting list for counseling (Mind Thurrock) and also take tablets: Sertraline. My nightmare journey of losing my beloved husband started six months and five days ago on Valentineās Day. Sending love and hugs.
1 Like
You will somehow manage, I canāt tell you how but you will get through your birthday. My husbandās birthday is two days before mine on the 24th June and I am 26th June. We celebrated them together and this year I did them both days alone without him. It was 8 months 256 days since he passed on his birthday but I survived it. You have this space for comfort, support and to let it out.
2 Likes
Thank you it can be a painful and lonely journey but this is a good place for support. Most of the time I am sad and try to be normal, the new normal is tough and hard work. He used to let me listen to his heartbeat the same one that let him down.
1 Like
Hi pudding, I hsve just joined as I lost my beloved husband 6 weeks ago, much of what you have said really resonated with me. My sleep pattern has gone exactly the same as you. I
also use a Cpap and am now only sleeping around 3 hours a night. I am tearful all the time but that is a recent thing.
2 Likes
@MrsM57 . The good news is that my sleep is gradually improving. At 3 months I donāt cry all the time but I do cry every day. I only got up twice last night. It is a real pain that we canāt take sleeping pills that seem to help many in the short term. The doctor basically said very sorry but it is too dangerous which I understand. The posts on here at least give some hope that things will improve. Xx. Sandra
2 Likes