I did it all in the first month. I was so glad we had joint accounts . It was just something to occupy my mind as I was in such a shocked state for the first few months
I got a lovely lady when I rang Sky she just changed the name to mine,then kept me talking sympathising with me and telling me about her experience of losing her husband.
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My husband and I both worked in IT. We made sure we always knew each others passwords even though he did most of household accounts. Even for me it has been a learning curve. These intuitive IT systems are far from perfect. Would help if they tested them with a range of people.
The household utilities, house, and current accounts were in joint names. ISAs and Premium Bonds cannot be in joint names. NS&I are notorious for always requiring Probate.
Even joint accounts and utilities require you to actually have names removed when that person has died.
With the benefit of hindsight we would all familiarise ourselves with learning how to do everything, cooking, plaiting little girls hair, online banking, operating the washing machine.
But we are human, and not psychic. We fall into our roles, concentrating on what we are good at or interested in.
When the unthinkable happens we have to pick up the pieces and learn how to do everything ourselves, at a time when we are least able to.
Finances do not always stretch to engaging accountants or solicitors, particularly with the costs involved with funerals, death certificates, probate fees, etc.
Often the person left behind is faced with finding and paying for professionals to do jobs our partners used to do.
Itās very easy for people to tell us that we should have learned to do things before it was too late.
We know that now!
Onwards and upwards. Xx
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I agree. I know how lucky I have been to be able to afford the professionals. My neighbour really helped. She was widowed 7 years ago and tells everyone to put everything you can in joint names. This prompted us to make sure all utilities and insurances etc we could were in joint names. I was also lucky enough to have a financial advisor who is also a good friend to sort out the pensions and isa.
It is awful that we have to deal with this admin at a time when we are least able to think straight.
My brother is benefiting from my experiences. His wife has terminal ovarian cancer. Apart from going through her bucket list she is teaching him to cook and operate all household appliances. He has written himself a user manual. Would that we could all have had the time and foresight. But that is not the way of the world or human beings.
The one thing I find truly amazing is that somehow we all work through and find a way.
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I relate to what you say. I had a solicitor to apply for Probate and a financial advisor but there were still things to do some of which I was not sure about. I have no family to help me with any of it. The stress made me quite ill and I ended up with Shingles. 12 months since my partner died and I am still not back to feeling welll again.
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I thought I had sorted out most, not all, of the paperwork.
Then a letter arrived last weekend.
I hope, 
, I sorted that bit out yesterday.
It took 3 attempts to get through to someone.
First couple attempts everyone was busy and nobody was available.
The lady on the phone sounded very knowledgeable, I do hope she was.
I explained what had happened and some inconsistencies and mistakes.
She couldnāt understand them either.
However, she got on her computer and hopefully sorted everything out.
The previous person I spoke to in July had not explained things totally or it seems arranged for paperwork to be sent to me.
It turns out that despite all that, the important action had been taken and the letter should not have been sent to me.
Please keep your fingers crossed that it has finally been sorted.
I still have some things to tackle and based on what I have already experienced,
I am dreading dealing with it.
Plus, I find it stressful as it emphasises that he is no longer here.
As I have read on here, it feels like he is being erased.
I feel his place in the world is being removed each time I have to deal with paperwork, make a phone call to notify or confirm he has died.
Also, I have not tackled everything as I genuinely forget things need to be done.
So next week I will try to sort another thing.
Love and hugs,
Rose xx
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Im fortunate my oldest son is dealing with everything althpugh he has been in usa for 2 weeks but due home later tonight as he is executor to the will, i also need all the bills transferred in to my name ,so much to do its enough to make your your head burst open x
I was in charge of all of the financial stuff but the only thing in his name, which I had a major problem sorting out, was the broadband thingy. Itās all sorted now and I definitely need to change suppliers and get the rooter moved from the loft as I canāt get to it there. The only reason I really need access to his stuff is because he had a lot of his photographs only on his bits of the computers and years ago he wrote a number of books which Iād like to get hold of in order to publish. I always keep my passwords simple, whereas Keef would seem to over complicate things, changing them every 5 minutes! Iām sure Iāll eventually manage to get it sorted.