Thank you for sharing your feedback here @Stargazer. It’s really good that you’re raising these concerns and will always listen and do what we can to help with any concerns that you’re having. I’ve responded back to the original thread ‘Moderation of PMs’ which I hope helps answer some of your questions.
Hi everyone,
Thank you for your patience while I looked into this today. I really appreciate you raising this, it’s completely understandable to hear your concerns about PMs being read. To confirm our moderation processes, we don’t monitor private messages, and will only read them if someone has reported them. We have a bit more information about our moderation in our Terms and Conditions - Terms & Conditions - Sue Ryder Online Bereavement Community
After doing some investigating today, we’ve found there’s been an issue with a feature of the community which reports posts to moderators and staff. It seems this has also temporarily been flagging a few PMs which the system thinks is a post which goes against the guidelines.
We’re going to review our training and processes urgently, and get in touch with all of our moderators with some additional training to make sure this all gets resolved. Please be assured your PMs aren’t something that we monitor, and we understand how worrying this might have been to you.
I hope this has helped ease any uncertainty. Once again thank you for bringing this to our attention, we really appreciate your help in keeping the community a safe and supportive space.
We’re going to keep this thread locked, but if you would like to get in touch to talk about this in more detail, you can email me at online.community@suerydercare.org.
All the best,
Aife
I’m going to lock this thread too but I’m more than happy for you to get in touch with me over email if you’d like to discuss this in more detail. 
Take lots of care, Aife