HI JME
What you have said totally hits the nail on the head! I asked my son today to take anything he wanted out of the freezer because I wouldnt be using it. HIs clothes will stay where they are for however long it takes. At first I was thinking I would bag them up and then leave it until I could go through them but since reading different peoples views and now yours I am going to leave them were they are because its up to me now what I do.
I can hear him in my ear making remarks when I’ve done things (or not) as the case maybe. I will never ever get over his loss and when friends say be strong I’m like what how can I be strong I have lost a part of me which just wont be fixed by being strong but I was probably the same with friends who had lost their soul mates saying he or she will be around you! How wrong was I! No-one needs to hear that they want their life partner back and now. Countless times I have asked to be with him because it was always me and him, him and me. Everyone said that when we werent together for whatever reason they always asked where the other was because we were always together and they werent use to see one without the other which is good but it makes me feel even more lonely but lonely is how I want to be at the minute. Everything is conflicting and you know you are a completely different person to the one you were before.
Sometimes I do think it is hell on earth.
I feel for you I really do. I think were both singing from the same hymn sheet even though, at the moment, I cannot believe in God.
xx