I got some rescue remedy. I’ll try anything right now! For sleeping. I have my oldest daughter in my bed to cuddle most nights. I can fall asleep ok right now but when my youngest wakes me up then ping my mind won’t shut off and I’m awake. A lovely lady on here recommended the rescue remedy. It’s worth a shot.
Well, my mum is back home. She looks really comfy and is in the living room with the fire lit. It’s cozy and that’s how she’d want it.
I think I’m just either numb with pain or it just hasn’t sank in (still really early days!!) - I think it might be the latter and my mind thinks that it’s just not real. I think if my mind knew it was real, I wouldn’t stop crying. Anyway, I’m grateful that I feel ok for now.
My dads upstairs fast asleep, which is good, and my wife’s asleep on the living room sofa. So at least by using this form I don’t feel alone and I’ve got something to do/keep my mind occupied!
I’m now going to try and sleep too - thanks again for your help today.
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You’re probably just doing the practical stuff right now. Which is perfectly normal.
I hope you managed to get some sleep?
Here for you.
Nic
The most horrific moment of my life happened this morning; my amazing mum passed away. Even writing this feels like I’m just writing some sort of made up story. And no matter how much I tell myself it’s real, it just doesn’t always feel it. To be honest, I’m glad it doesn’t feel like it’s real - cos if it did, it would probably kill me.
After mum passed we had to tell my kids. The soon to be 10 year old cried a lot. The 3 year old was comforting us all - so young yet so brave and strong.
Then we met the funeral director at my parents home. We knew the guy from my brothers funeral, so it was quite relaxed. Afterwards me, my wife, my dad and the kids went to the playing field where my mum used to take our kids.
My dads done well today. But he’s finding it so so hard. There will be times when he will just want to give in and die to be with mum. I’ll do my best to support him.
We went for a drive and a bite to eat as we couldn’t be bothered to cook. Then went back to my parents home to stay there (the kids wanted to, and my dad did too). It’s been really strange but we’ve had some really nice moments. Lots of tears and lots of smiles and love. The youngest asked where’s nana. And then asked when she gets better will she be coming home. Proper heartbreaking.
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@Hopleys I am truley sorry for the loss of your wonderful Mum, you will find comfort knowing you was with her…I certainly do.
I think the day my mum died it felt so surreal and to this day 5 weeks on I sometimes think its not real, I don’t know whether thats a good thing or not.
My children are 10 & 8, they cried when we told them but have honestly dealt with it amazingly, they even did a reading for their nanna at church. My little boy who is 8 says at least nanna is not in pain anymore and back with her daddy. 
At first I thought there was something wrong with me because I did not cry alot but I’ve come to realise grief is such a whirlwind.
I wish you and your family strength and love at this very difficult time.
Oh I’m so so sorry for the loss of your mum.
My soon to be 3 year old comforted me a lot. It’s sweet as it shows their caring nature.
Take as much as you can from those small moments. They will bring you some comfort.
Thinking of you and sending strength and love to you all at this time.
Keep talking. We’re here for you on here too.
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Your situation has struck such resonance with me as what you are facing right now is what I was going though 7 weeks ago when I lost my mum who was given days after a severe stroke.
It’s so hard and I feel your pain - it’s probably the hardest pain you will have had and I was literally all over the place as I saw my mother in her final days. I was petrified of my life without her and like you, had been with me and supported me through life’s many downs but said "hooray’ when things took a turn for the better.
Feel it all, cry and just be there right now for these are precious moments. Speak to her and see her all around you, talk about her and just remember the love you shared.
Thinking of you xx