Hello lovely people in my phone, it’s been awhile since I’ve posted on here. It’s been a year since Patrick passed. Can’t believe it’s been that length of time. It’s still raw today as it was then, doesn’t get any better. I think you get better at hiding how you feel from other people, because you don’t want them to be upset so you put on this brave front. Everyone thinks I’m strong and brave, that i’m doing well but I’m not. I think I’m just a good actor. It’s like Groundhog Day every day I wake up turn over expecting to see him there then realising he’s not. Even though I have an amazing family, lovely grandchildren and very supportive friends it’s so lonely. I find myself reliving the days from the shocking diagnosis of motor neuron disease to Patrick’s passing , 14 weeks later in the hospice. The pain and rapid decline he went through was horrendous so fast so cruel, the trauma of watching him suffer will stay with us all forever. I sometimes think as a family, we won’t ever recover from that. Miss him so much ! we were together for 52 years , my soulmate, phe was such a fit healthy man and then suddenly he wasn’t. I don’t know who I am anymore without him. I’m writing this at 3:43 am. Can’t sleep. Thank you for reading.
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So sorry for your loss Chrish62. As you can see I can’t sleep either! I lost my beloved partner suddenly 13 weeks ago - he’d literally just turned 76. No medical conditions or medication and like your husband looked 10 years younger.
Everyone is still in shock as he was considered so fit and healthy. I’m saddened to hear that 12 months on that feelings are still as raw as ever. Sending love and strength to face another day x
Hi Jody thank you for replying yes this is becoming a regular wake up time. So very sorry to hear of your loss. It’s definitely shocking when you lose a partner when they are so fit and healthy. I always thought it would be me that went first. I’m 70 he was 77. Thinking of you take care sending hugs.
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