1 year since my beautiful Mum passed away

I can’t believe it’s exactly a year since my mum died. Saying it seems like a long time, but in reality it’s forever and no time at all. It still feels like it was yesterday that you were still here and you were waving at me from your front door as I drove away. It still feels like yesterday when my world imploded and my dad phoned that you had stopped breathing in your sleep.
Yet all the pain and sadness we have dealt with everyday feels like forever.

I have realised that Grief is full of contradictions. Things are easier, but also not. I can manage my sadness better most of the time. I can laugh and have good days, yet I carry a sadness within that’ll never leave me. Some pains are never going to leave us.
My life has changed so much, yet aspects are exactly the same. I lost my mum and my best friend and trying to navigate it all is hard.

I love you Mum and miss you everyday xx

6 Likes

Lynn, you understand how grieving affects you and each person is different but we also have so much in common on this road of grieving.
Unbelievable but there are three posts, one after each other all basically saying the same thing, I do hope you all will read each other’s post and get same comfortable from each other.
Losing mums is really hard , they are special people in our lives and when they leave us we feel it hard. They will always be part of us and our life’s, please read others post which I do hope help you.
Take care and stay safe. Sxxx

3 Likes

Lynne, I’ve not been on here for a few weeks, I’ve looked back on today, as im almost at my own set of first year anniversaries.
Reading your post, it’s like reading my own.
Mum’s are just so incredibly important, whatever the relationship. They are our first best friends, and mine continued to be for the next 50 years. The enormous gap they leave behind can’t be put into words. And the sadness… I can’t begin to describe the pain it leaves behind.
I’m so very grateful for this site, it helps me feel less alone.
My first anniversary is this Tuesday, the day I found my mam who had attempted to take her own life. The 21st is the day she found peace when she collected her wings.
Hugs to you Lynne, you’re not alone in your grief xx

1 Like

Just lost my mom 2 weeks ago. Don’t know how I will go on without constantly crying. I took care of her for many,many years. There is now such a void. I will never stop missing her.

1 Like

Hi marylou
I’m so sorry for your loss too. This site has definitely helped me a lot too. Just getting some thoughts or worries out and people instantly saying that’s how they feel is comforting.
I don’t feel the need as much to talk here now, but I know it’s here if I need to.
Take care x

1 Like

Hi Mimiskid
Just take one day at a time, or if that’s even too much just an hour at a time. Thinking about the future definitely overwhelmed me. You’ll cry and cry until you think you don’t have tears anymore….that’s ok. Don’t be hard on yourself. Losing our Mums is one of the worst things to ever go through. I can say I cried everyday at some point for 3 months and then slowly I had a day here and there when I didn’t and slowly the tears became less. I still have days now and again when I can’t stop crying again, but everyone says that’s just the grief waves that come and go.
Take care of yourself
Lynn x

3 Likes