10 weeks today

Losing a partner
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It’s 10 weeks today since I lost my shaun, my soul mate…

Waking up with the sickness, pain, anxiety and fear this morning like every other morning :broken_heart:

I hate this so much, how is this life now

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@Scarl34 7 weeks today for me. And yes I can identify with the feeling sick and so lonely feelings.

Let’s hope today is a better one, but I don’t suppose it will be. Maybe sunshine will help.

Take care

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Morning @Paddy53 everyday feels the same but I always wake and i just got back to that Wednesday morning and relive it all over again.

Totally exhausted before even getting up out of bed :disappointed:

Another day, another long battle xx

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Its a awful feeling the anxiety the sickness the emptiness. Its 4 months next tuesday for me life is so cruel :cry: cant wait for Christmas to be over im dreading it.
Big hugs x

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Awake since 3.45 palpitations, feeling sick, still in bed because I don’t see the point in another day. 8 weeks on sunday.

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9 weeks on Saturday for me, I’m so lost without him. I’m truly heartbroken, I’m wondering if going back to work will help? I’m sure my Steve would hate to see me like this. I’m just locking myself away in my house.x

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I’m dreading it too but I have to do it for our 9 year old :broken_heart: it’s just so horrible I don’t want to do this anymore.
Sending you lots of love x

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Oh @Juliebobs I’m so sorry :broken_heart: there are just no words. This is a torturous life battle we have no way of escaping x

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Hi @Helen24 so sorry for your loss… I remember in the hospice shaun making me promise him I would try and keep going, live life for us both, go back to work and try to be happy… and of course I promised him I would because that’s what he deserves, but now I’m left it is so so hard to try and keep going xx

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Hi thanks for the message, me and Steve never got to have that conversation (thankfully I think) but I know what you mean. They wouldn’t like us moping around and crying all the time. Today is just a bad day for me I can’t stop crying. Hate this feeling so much, it’s so mentally draining.xx

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I’m having a really bad day too @Helen24 just feel I’m facing more stress and worry everyday and I am struggling so much to keep my head above water. Right now I just feel like I’m drowning and everything is just getting worse x

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I know that feeling, it’s like your life is on pause but the world keeps moving. I had a good day yesterday popped into my workplace one of the girls even said how lovely to see me smile. Walking home then I saw a family putting their tree up and I broke down. I’ve cried so much today. Sending you a hug.x

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Oh @Scarl34 I feel for you :broken_heart:. I know exactly how you feel. Got up this morning feeling shaky for the first time and tearful as usual. Can’t stop the tears. Don’t know why but maybe it’s because it will be 8 weeks tomorrow I lost Tony. It is a wretched life we are living (not even living, more existing). Every day the pain, loneliness, yearning is still there. I miss him putting his arms around me and telling me that everything will be ok. My heart goes out to you. Sending you a lot of love and hugs. Here to listen and support you. Joyce xx

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@StarGate same here!! All I want is shaun to hug me and I know everything would be ok?

I cried into my pillow last night asking him to help me, to just please help me… but there is no help and I know no matter how much I try and tell myself to keep going I just don’t know what for xx

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@Scarl34 So sorry we can’t have the hugs we need. I keep asking Tony to give me the strength to continue but like you knew it won’t happen. I do feel your pain very much. Thinking of you. Sending extra hugs and a whole load of love :heart: Joyce xx

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@StarGate and @Scarl34 what we’d give for just one more hug or one more “I love you”.

I wasn’t too bad today crying wise, and then I heard the song that he had for his funeral entrance music, Everybody wants to rule the world, and became hysterical. When will it stop?

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Shauns song came on yesterday on the tele he had at his service “stuck in the middle with you” and I just literally froze!!! I don’t think il ever be able to listen to that song again!! :broken_heart::broken_heart: @Paddy53

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