100 yards

The cemetery where my wifes ashes are buried, in a old family grave along with her mum and sister, is next to a park. I went for a walk with one of my wifes sisters and her husband the other day and she told me that the girls in the family used to play a game on some steps that lead down to a rose garden in the park. When I visit the grave now I also visit the steps where she used to play, I try to imagine her there playing with her sisters, I’m trying to find somewhere where I feel my wifes presence, so far with no luck, she played on those steps when she was a little girl, lived her life and ended up in a grave 100 yards away from the steps.
Sometimes I feel as if , 7 months after she died, I’m losing my mind.


Hi there. Sorry for your loss. Of course, you’re not losing your mind. You are dealing with your grief and there is no right or wrong way. I’m sure most of us do what we would have thought in the past as crazy things. I do too, now that I’ve lost someone so close! I visit my mum’s grave most days and talk to her there. I sometimes look around in case anyone thinks I’m a little crazy talking out loud. But who cares. It’s most natural that losing someone so precious changes us and leads us to question everything about them. From what I’ve read about grief and looked through the online ‘psychic’ videos on Youtube, they are with us all the time, their ‘soul’ is now energy and can never die. We can sometimes sense their presence, but not always; give it time. I’ve read that the ‘soul’ has to adapt to the afterlife, and sometimes they are confused and don’t realize they have passed. Sometimes it can take a year for them to come through to us. I just hope. And it appears they will send us signs if they feel there is something they really want to tell us. But I do believe. I believe there is more to life than we can ever imagine, and no doubt one day we will find out too, and meet them again. I’m sure she is there beside you every day, hearing your thoughts and watching your crazy antics on the steps!! Big hugs. xxx