11 months on

Since my last post here in April I am 2 weeks away from my 1st year after losing my partner… I got through Christmas, his birthday, and now having to face the day he died… I have decided to take the day off, don’t know what I am going to do you cannot plan your feelings can you, the only arrangements I have made is to have dinner with my wonderful freind who was with me when I was told Graham had died… I still have not managed to sell my home, twice my chain has collapsed, very stressful time as I am half packed.
Everyday is still a struggle but I try to get up and get on with my day, I still have days when I feel cannot face the world but I push myself to get going… but if I do feel bad on a day I tell people, I feel sad today, trying not to show your feelings when you feel sad because you don’t want to make someone worry about you does not help… if you feel sad tell someone, talk it out, share your sadness
Love to everyone on here xxx

Hi Mo,

I have just passed the 1st anniversary of my Mum passing away. The build up to the day was the worst for me, not knowing how I would feel, act, whether i would even get out of bed that day.

All I can say was it was not as bad as I expected, all the anticipation and worry. Yes I was terribly sad and had a couple of wobbles and a good cry on my bed at one point. The rest of the day rushed by and I went out for a meal in the evening.

I am moving house in a couple of weeks time so packing, fretting about that as well. I am sorry to see you have been let down by chains. Not fair at all and not much fun half packed and potentially living out of a suitcase.

You are so right, if you feel rubbish some days tell people. They don’t know unless you say something and if they judge you for it, well that is tough and their problem.

Love to you too

Hi Mel

Thank you for your kind words and understanding, My thoughts are with you losing your mum.
I know I am not the only one out there, this website really helps because I know there are others feeling and doing the same things trying to get through our grief… Good luck with your move, I have just put my apartment with another agent yesterday, gone live on Rightmove so fingers crossed… hoping things will get moving again for me… Love Mo x

Hi all

I live in Hurst Berkshire and have had bereavement counselling which did help me. Does anyone know of any groups that are more a social way of helping each other in the Berkshire area? Although my one to one counselling helped me earlier on I feel I would like a more social group, but can only seem to find “dating groups on Google” which is not what I am looking for… Just a coffee and chat it all I need at this time… Mo x

Hi Mo,

A lot of people seem to have had good experiences with WAY (Widowed and Young, for under 50s) or Way Up (for those aged 50+).

These are both websites that allow widows and widowers to connect with others in their local area and organise meet-ups and social events.

Thank you Priscilla, I did contact this group quite a few months back and asked if I could join as I was not married to my partner did this matter, they said no but when I filled in their online form I got an email stating that I could not join the group, don’t know why, remember being quite upset at the time…

Oh dear, that doesn’t sound right, not after you were told you could join. Do you think someone could have made a mistake? I can understand that must have been upsetting.

Jolly Dollies is another similar organisation that some people on this site have mentioned - perhaps they’d be worth a try?

I have heard very good reports on these and been recommended to join by MacMillan who supported me initially, as in many ways this is like losing a partner as this is the person who was there for me 24/7 and much more than just a best friend. However other people have suggested this is inappropriate.
Meanwhile I did try Cruse and had some excellent one to one counselling, but there is no group in my area.