18 months on…..

18 months yesterday I was placed on this bitch (sorry) of a road.
ALL our working life we had talked about semi retirement and after helping out with the grandkids that would be OUR time.
Life had a completely different plan for us I was robbed of the love of my life and all our plans gone!!! In the blink of an eye.
I have carried on for the sake of the kids and grandkids and I know for sure if it hadn’t of been for them I would have gone 18 months ago too.
If I had saved all my tears over these last 18months I would be able to fill a swimming pool I’m sure of it .
Some say it gets better , but I’m not so sure of that it still feels just as raw today as it did 18 months ago .
I try to live each day to make him proud but I wonder if I’m doing that anymore in just floating through the days , fingers crossed summer will perk me up as last summer is a blur I can’t remember last summer at all .
Anyway rant over take care whoever takes the time to read my rant


Dear @Kazzer

Life can be so cruel but in time we learn to accept the horrid emptiness and loss of our loved one passing.

I am sure you are making your partner proud even if it does not feel like it. Grief has no time limits and 18 months is still raw for you.

I do think that with the Covid restrictions that have been in place has restricted living a normal life which does not help with the bereavement process, ie visiting people, going places and getting together. Thankfully it is slowly beginning to change.

Dark, gloomy wintery days do not help as they can be so depressing unlike Spring and Summer which brings lighter days and warmer weather. You will be able to get out more and take the grandchildren to the park etc.

Feel free to rant that is why we are here and we will continue to support and listen to you at any time.

Please take care of yourself.