Just realised l found out this time 2 weeks ago Mark had passed. It’s just hit me like a tonne of bricks. I’m sat with family and l just want to cry. I’m on a state of panic and anxiety 
4 Likes
I’ve spent the last two days wishing I wasn’t here - can’t talk to either of my kids- can’t get the word’s out without crying & trying hard to suppress the screaming that’s going on inside me. Plus it’s too painful for them to hear how much I miss their dad & want to be with him 
. I cried so much this afternoon I exhausted myself & fell asleep for a couple of hours - the dog woke me asking to go out. Now she’s all out of sorts & keeps cleaning my face for me. I’ve put plans in place for her if I don’t wake up one morning or if something were to happen to
me. It makes me panic to think of any future without him by my side 
3 Likes
The internal screaming is the worst. I feel like l want to scream at the top of my lungs. I may drive tomorrow and find somewhere to do this. I may get the coroners report this week which will be the second blow. Then l have to arrange the funeral. It’s all very surreal. I’m just trying to take one day at a time. I don’t have the energy for anything else. Xx
3 Likes
I am 2 weeks ahead of you. The funeral is tomorrow, and i don’t know how to cope.
I hate everything and prople talk about moving on when i just want to cry and ask life to bring me where he is. I just want to be with him
3 Likes
@Kearray
I do my screaming in the car when I drive from Aberdeen to Perthshire. My poor wee:dog: howls with me - we must sound fearful 
- just as well no can hear us. Waiting for the coroner to go over the details must be awful - sending you strength x x
2 Likes
@MsYeti - thinking of you today as you go through the funeral - loads of us will be. Hold tight xx
2 Likes
Hope today has gone ok x
Thinking of you today 