25 Weeks today and still not coping

Coping with bereavement
#1

Stillness

Eternal lights flicker in a distant sky
Where have you gone; why did you die?

When I first saw you, you stole my heart,
And until that awful day, we have never been apart.

I look to the heavens, hoping to see you anew
Where have you gone? I’m searching for you.

My painful cries fill the dark of night
I need your arms to hold me tight.

Where have you gone? show me the place
So I can once again see the smile on your face.

We met life’s challenges and somehow made it through
But how do I do it alone without you?

I know you are in my heart, but I long to see your face
Memories of yesterday leave only a trace.

There’s emptiness now that nothing can fill
I so need to find you so I, too, can be still.

5 Likes
#2

Wow how spooky I literally read that poem a couple of days ago it’s beautiful. So very true eh

It is or feels impossible to move on, playing the same day on a loop.

My heart goes out to you :heart:

1 Like
#3

Thank you for you kind thoughts.
It just feels like I’m stuck on that day I lost my partner and can’t see a future without him. I just miss hime more and more each day.
I never got the chance to say goodbye which makes me feel worse.
Take care xx

1 Like
#4

Bless, I wish I could offer you something… Anything positive but like you I’m stuck and can’t see how we go forward without that person we loved more then life itself. Like most I thought we’d grow old together now I don’t want to grow at all.

Yes I certainly feel your pain there not being able to say goodbye I think probably like you that plays on my mind the most.

Are you managing to set yourself small tasks each day just to keep busy? x

#5

Life just feels so empty now. I try to stay strong and pretend I’m ok to my daughter and friends, but always end up in tears thinking about him when I’m on my own, which is most of the time really. I just can’t see an end to all these sad thoughts and feelings.
I’m not managing to do much. Each day is just the same - get up, try to get on with the housework but I’ve got no heart in doing anything. I only get dressed if I need to go out to the shops. Can’t see the point in doing anything as nothing feels right or worthwhile without him anymore.
In the earlier weeks, I did start going over the park for a walk, but can’t even muster up the energy to do that any more.
Today, all I’m doing is looking at the clock remembering the time I got the dreaded phone call. I hate Sundays!
Sorry to burden you with my thoughts, especially when I know you are going through your own heartache.
I am so sorry for your loss and hope you are coping at this difficult time.
xx

1 Like
#6

Have you thought of the counselling offered by Sue Ryder, it’s so hard to cope on your own

#7

You are not burdening anyone. We are all going through the most unimaginable pain.my husband aged 51 fell banged his head, two weeks later he died. Seven months on i have cried every day. I have two daughters 24 and 22 and have to be strong for them. Their dad would want them to have the best life possible.I have moments where it just rushes back, i dont like loud noises as it takes me back when i heard him fall. Sending you a hug x

2 Likes