I’m absolutely dreading November 26 it would have been Robs 60th birthday and he would have loved a party or gathering of some kind .
I will light a candle for him on that day and remember the fun times we had and believe me there’s been quite a few.
This has made me stress the importance to the kids how important it is to make memories , without them I would have been lost many times this last three years not that they have made it any easier but they have helped .
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Hi Kazzer, he was far too young well done for the last 3 years and for being so strong for your children, take care on 26th
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He was @Kazzer my husband was 60 too … whrn he passed last december - not fair is it when my stupid parents are still alive at 83 
xx
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Hi, my heart goes out to you all. It would have been my husband’s 60th birthday too this year (August), and it will be three years since he was suddenly taken away from me in November, still seems like yesterday though.
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Yeh its strange where time seems to go ? I feel like ive done nothing this year. My husband passed in december and i feel like only thing i have achieved is cry for him. 10 months on i miss every single thing about him ! I wish he was here cos i loved him so much ! And i wish i had gone with him … x
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Such a long time to miss someone it sounds like time goes but our love never dies. How to cope, my husband only died a month ago, don’t know how I am going to cope 
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I hope you cope ok ? ( a month is not long … The pain gets easier but i still miss him very much and in so many ways i cant even tell you … i dunno if i should move or what to do really ! I just wish i could be happy but i am so unhappy without him … its so hard … living without the person you love … good luck in your journey ! x
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Thank you, I’m trying to function, but feel sick and scared
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You will do … its very early days for you it takes so much adjusting … its not easy any of this … its heartbreaking and so hard. Best advice i can give you is just take it a day at a time, and hour at a time if you have to. Also i have a journal where i write to my husband when i need to. In fact im gonna write to him tonight. It really helps you know. Xx
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I have written to my husband every night since he died a month ago. I’ve got cross with him , cried with him and just told him about the day. I do it before I go to sleep and I think it helps.
But I miss him so much, and I’m sad and scared too, and feel sick most of the time.
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Do you ? Helps doesnt it ? I had a bad week this week. I think its cos im not seeing as many people with the weather and even when i take my dog hardly anybody is about. I miss talking to my husband so much … that’s my main thing. I just miss his company. He looked after me in so many ways xx
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Yes I feel sick with grief.
The sun shines and want to go somewhere nice. I start to think about it and panic sets in.
Then can’t find things I need. By the time I have the sun has gone.
As usual missed the boat. We would have helped each other. Then the tears come.
It is a toss up whether I carry on regardless or just give up and not go.
Spose I took some steps towards it counts tell myself.
Not fair he is not here and older people are here. I am older than him but he dies first.
Someone said I am still cut up after 11 months because of the guilt they think I would feel because I was stupid enough to share how frustrating my life was as if they assumed I should be glad when I am devastated. As if they judge and blame me.
I find that so upsetting to have to bear it. From someone never lost a partner from death just walked out themselves or was walked out by another and now not happy with third wife. I was with him all the way.
It is these reactions puts me off going out when just get upset more.
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I read the same experiences over and over, feeling sick, lonely, lost, sad, how long does this go on, do we ever get out of this depression how do people manage . I’m so pleased to have these messages to see that I am not alone with my feelings.
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Yep thats just how i feel. I was 18 months older than my husband too and my parents are alive at 83 ! Why wasnt it them. ? My poor husband. He had so much love to give. Its just not fair is it and just ignore the idiots reactions. Best not to talk to people who cant sympathise i think xx
I agree, sadly I lost my mum last Christmas when she was 94yrs old, I fully expected my husband to get to his 80s at least I feel very cheated, we had loads of life left to live. Keep positive, I hear things get better, at least I hope so x
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Well I guess and hope one day I will not have it looming large but that it will get smaller. Not the same when my baby was born dead a whole lifetime ago, it is so different from grief for a son who had nothing and was denied everything to a husband who lived a full life who I knew for rwo thirds of my life. From Missing what might have been to missing what was and is no longer. It took three years for this huge lump in my heart to gradually diminish over the years.
It is only not even one year so far and I do not feel used to it. I won’t as got to invent it as I go along.
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