5 weeks

my wife passed away on the 02/11/16 to myeloid leukaemia just under 5 weeks after being diagnose. we had been married for 37 years.
i am in bits, broken all our dreams and plans finished. i just cant believe the speed of her passing and i am struggling to come to terms with it all. it hurts every moment of the day. i have family to lean on but it is not enough i just want to be with my wife again, this existence is so painful.

Hello David j , I wish I had wonderful words of wisdom unfortunately I don’t . All I can promise you is that there are lots of people on this forum who feel your pain acutely . I still struggle three months on , my husband of thirty years was taken suddenly as well . I can’t offer you platitudes, but only advise you to take any support that is available . Myself and others are here to travel this difficult path alongside you. Kind regards Kim .

David im very sorry for your loss .Have you been to see your GP? re medication to help.Also theres the Samaritians there therec 24 7 365 .I phone them they help me friend Hug Colin

Hi David J, so sorry for your loss. It’s three months since my husband died and it’s still painful. Like all of us here you will find a way through the pain one day at a time, you’ll have good days and bad days. Ted had lung cancer and was given a few months to a year when he was diagnosed we made 19 months. It’s still a shock when you lose a loved one. Take care and any time you want to talk you’ll find someone on here that understands what your going through.
Jackie JT

Hi David j,
Was a carer for my little old mum who passed away on Nov 6th, 2016. Shell shocked and numb all the time…so I can (and everyone on this site can as well) relates to the emotions you are going through.
Find that I am breaking down all the .time. Avoiding places I used to take her in her wheelchair. Advised today that if I keep doing that I am going to do myself a long term discervice…it will get to the point that I will be avoiding everywhere and making myself more anxious.
don’t bottle yourself up and grieve in your time the way you want to no matter how long it takes.
I am so sorry for your loss. there are a lot of good people here. you will get a sympathetic and supportive response from people here. take care.

hello Kim. thank you for replying never used internet forums before i am not even on facebook etc, so i was not sure if i should try it. i did not realise how much i relied on my wife and i feel so guilty for not appreciating her more and showing her how much i loved and cared for her. life is so empty now and i wonder how to get through it. i can only offer you my best wishes and support in your struggle for your loss and thank you for taking the time to respond to my pain. i hope i can cope as well as you do and take some comfort that i am not walking the path alone. kindest regards dave.

hi david
thank you for response i feel the same way about sue my wife where ever i go in the car, in the country around my local area even at home such pain and loss.
try to keep busy but its a real struggle. thought i would tidy sues garden up and her passion but had tears rolling down my face as i tried. i know its very early days and i would like to thank you for helping me and taking the time to reply. but feel still breaking down is natural at the moment for both of us. but hope in time that will become less.
kind regards
dave j

hi jackie
thank you for your reply and i am so sorry for your loss and i am sure you will get stronger every day. my problem is i only got 5 weeks to try to come to terms with her illness before she was gone. i spent everyday at her bedside clutching at any hope she might respond to treatment and give us another 6 months. in our relationship sue was always the strong one who kept us grounded i was always the dreamer. i hope you and ted had as many happy years together as me and sue if you did then you had a wonderful time together.
kindest regards
dave j