My husband passed away in February 2026, with pneumonia and dementia. I was his carer for a number of years from being an alcoholic, which ended when he had a kidney infection. Luckily he accepted he could no longer drink. Then he was diagnosed with dementia, this was a very difficult time as you can imagine. Eventually my beloved started to become frail and his weight gradually dropped. As he could no longer consume the food. He passed away in hospital it was heartbreaking.
Six months have passed, 10th August was his birthday. It was awful, I felt very low all day. I thought to myself my husband isn’t here, and my black Labrador who passed away in 2025 has gone.
I now have a lovely Pyrenees dog, she is gorgeous and I love her to bits. But life has now changed, and it’s very scary.
My hardest time is in the morning, sometimes I just can’t get out of bed. I feel thumb, as though I’m in a black hole and I can’t get out. My brain won’t let me!
I used to be such a bubbly person outgoing. Up in the morning for a run, and walking the dog, working and getting on with the day. It’s all gone 
. I’m no longer that person, I miss me I really do.
I do yoga every morning which helps. The running is on hold because my dog pulled me over. I had to stop working to look after my husband now I’m seeking work.
What I would give to be happy again. I know my husband wouldn’t want me to be unhappy. But grief is harder than I ever imagined.
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Hello Cassie, im so sorry for the loss of your husband, I lost my husband in march, we were married for 35 years..i also looked after my husband, I no longer worked as I stayed home looking after him…I know how you feel, I was always a morning person, id go out walking early every morning, id be back before 7 to give my husband his medication, he was always surprised that id already been out walking..now i don’t even want to get up in the morning, ..i do hope we both start feeling better soon. Take care of yourself and God bless you 
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Dear Tracey I am sorry you are struggling with your grief and your life as it is now. It’s really hard for us all to try and find some reason to live when our lives have been dismantled in front of us. My wife was everything and in every part of my life so without her there is really nothing left. It’s now up to me to find some reason to keep going yet I’m also in a moment of life where I have little to no motivation. My wife died eight months ago yesterday and for the moment I’m trying to stay sane which is not a small goal. I also do yoga every morning which is helpful and I walk a lot in nature. Exercise is the thing that helps the most and at some point I hope I find something that motivates me but for now I think we have enough just to stay sane.
I hope you find something that brings a little joy into your life soon and in the meantime stay strong. Wishing you all the best and sending hugs
Tom
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Dear Cassie, you are not alone in your pain. Stay with this wonderfully supportive and understanding group, it has helped me enormously. Very gradually things change, ways of coping alter. Thinking of you.
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Dear Lucy I hope you find the strength to get back to walking in the mornings. I know it’s tough getting up in the morning but I’m sure you would feel better walking again. I find it so beneficial and I know you can’t get out later because of the heat. Thinking of you and sending hugs and strength
Wishing you all the best Tom
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Good morning Bonnie I hope everything is going well. Wishing you a peaceful day today
All the best Tom
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@Cassie_2024 Hi Cassie! I also lost my husband to dementia, 9 years now. Recently I lost my boyfriend. I’m glad you have your dogs for companionship, though no, it’s not the same, it never will be again 
Mornings are the worst! You wake up vulnerable, before your defenses are built.
Six months is still early, you are still in there, and will eventually be back, though never quite the same. You’ve made it through six months, you’ll make it through today. No way out, but through Cindy 
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Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry for your loss, I can’t imagine what it must be like to go through bereavement a second time.
It really does worry me, lying there so numb and no energy. I know we are all different but I hope this brain fog in the morning doesn’t stay with me too long.
This is harder than I ever thought it would be. After caring for my husband, and damaging my mental health. Now this, I feel like it will never end.
Take care
Tracy x
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