6 months since the loss of my wife

I lost my wife and best friend a little over 6 months ago and whilst i still hurt a lot and cry a lot There have been some things which are becoming clear to me as time goes by and I take the most painful journey of my life

Its not weak to cry (it’s a man thing) it’s a expression of the love you have for your partner

Any decisions you made in the early days of grief were the right ones for you at that particular time in your journey so don’t look back with regret.

Until you have lost the love of your life you never really understand the pain and how it really feels to grieve for a partner. So forgive friends and family for what you perceive as thoughtless or unsympathetic comments they make even with the best intentions

There will be days when you can see light at the end of the tunnel only for it to go dark again.

There will be trigger points which catch you off guard and send you back to square one. It’s still early days for me and I think I’m slowly excepting that this will always be true but hopefully as time heals it will become less painful.

It’s the little things in life that can also be painful like signing birthday cards with only your name, it’s hurts

We all grieve differently I feel that my life will never be the same and as good as the life I had with my wife. But I still have a life to live and will do my best to enjoy what years I have left knowing it will be different from the day she left this world. Knowing that the love we had will always be a part of who I am.

Grieving takes time its own time we are all different, I’m still shedding lots of tears usually when I’m alone at home and even out doors. Life is still hard and I struggle to hold it together whenever my wife’s name is mentioned but now I accept this is how I am and it’s normal for me and that’s all that matters to me

So to anyone starting this painful journey take one day at a time and live the best life you can along this road we sadly find ourselves traveling along


I loved reading your post, we can all relate to what you said and how you put it in lovely words.
I’m 3 years into to this journey and I still always put both our names on cards to our children and grandchildren. It doesn’t seem right not too.
Take care


I lost my Joan last February after 45 years of marriage,I don’t cry as such but some things put me in the pit of dispair. I’ve just changed the bed to ‘summer mode’ changing the duvet and putting the summer cover on, what a pig to do, the duvet is a king size and we both used to get on one end and shake it up and down to get it into the cover, both of us used to laugh as we were doing it.
This event put me in dire misery for a number of hours, you will understand this but anyone who has not lost their girl will think I’m nuts.
Best wishes mate.


At the risk of using a well worn sound bite…you are doing well mate. Everything you say resonates and is probably where I am just getting too…cept I’m 15 months into this horror show…best wishes :love_you_gesture:


Love all your posts. 19 months for me.
Still processing…

I too still sign all cards with my husband’s name, and I always will.

Love, hugs and strength to you all