First, I’d like to say thank you to everyone here that posts about their experience. Though I’d rather you’d not been in the midst of grief, for me, reading about the experience of others really helps and makes me feel less alone.
I’m now 7 months on from the loss of my dear mum at Christmas. I know that’s no time at all and like all of you, I miss her so much. I just try to carry on each day as best I can and have also recently moved home as I didn’t feel I wanted to stay where we had lived in the last couple of years. Too much sadness and I could see myself just becoming left there forever with my grief and I thought that wouldn’t be good. I moved away area wise as I’ve one surviving cousin and so moved a bit nearer to him with my two little dogs both of whom have been my solace.
I’m trying to settle in and have nice neighbours and a large new garden to plan and tend, but, I feel just the same. Sometimes, I think I feel worse. I was wondering what everyone’s experiences are of being at this sort of timeline? I know time is immaterial where grief and loss is concerned but I feel that things will never get better, however long I might live.
I’m 19 months on from the passing of my wife, like you say no one wants to be having this experience.
From 6 -12 months I found that things were starting to ease down a little bit, the griefs still there the tears still come. I could start looking back into our life together with fondness and a smile, sometimes thinking of the things we used to get up to in our early days together, and talking about the past with the family. It was hard to come home to an empty house, I won’t be moving home, I have too many happy memories here of the family growing up, for me to leave them behind.
I’ve got very good neighbours, live in a cul-de-sac so we all know each other very well. My son and daughter live within a 5 min drive, and it’s a 10 min drive to the cemetery were Linda’s buried.
Thank you so much for taking time to share your experience with me, it’s kind of you and I do really appreciate it. I hope soon that I’ll be in the same place.
It’s lovely that you have family to chat with about your wife, and I’m so pleased that little by little, you’ve started to be able to pull those happy memories to the forefront of your mind too. All those years and a lovely family that your love for each other resulted in. Bless you.
I really know what you mean about the house and returning home. I have to leave the radio or TV I just so there is a voice there when I come through the door.
Take care of yourself and thank you again.
Paula,