7 years after losing my son

Tomorrow is the 7 year anniversary. I lost my 12 week old son to whooping cough. Today I feel sad and I’m missing him terribly I’m dreading tomorrow as all the memories are at the fore front of my mind. I feel as though I cannot tell people even my own family how I’m feeling as it’s been 7 years and I feel as though i may be judged as attention seeking. I almost feel like I should be over losing him. I fight my feelings as I have other children to look after. I don’t know why I’m even on here rambling. Just needed to pit this out there. I miss him and I love him and I wish he did not loose his life x

Hello Leona, I am so sorry about your baby. The fact of the matter is, you will never get over losing your son. No matter how many years go by, you will never forget him and every single year you will be thinking, ‘he would be such and such an age’, who would he have looked like.

I know because we lost a child 45 years ago, I miscarried him late on in my pregnancy,
and I still think about him. My late sister lost twin girls, they lived a few hours and that was about the same time I lost our baby, she turned to anti-depressant tablets and was never the same again, she died a few years later of cancer, I went on to have another son but spent three months in hospital thinking I may lose him also, but everything worked out wonderfully.

You are his mum and always will be, there is no shame in wanting to talk about him because he was your son, your children’s brother and your parent’s grandchild. No-one will have forgotten about him even if they don’t talk about him, perhaps they keep their thought’s to themselves for fear of upsetting you.

No-one should ever be forgotten no matter how many years go by. Many was the time my husband and I used to wonder about our son, what would he be doing now. My husband died 3.1/2 years ago and when he died all I could think of that he was now with our family of the past and with our unborn son.

I am now 75 years old and have never, ever forgotten that terrible day, it is as clear in my mind as if it was today.

Remember your son as much as you want to because he did exist and deserves to be remembered as a part of your family, don’t bother what other people think, they didn’t go through what you, his mum went through, if you want to cry, just cry.

Love.

Sheilax