I lost my partner on November 9th. I feel as if my reason for living has not disappeared. I’m 50; we were together for 23 years. I know I will see him again once I transition (whatever that feels/looks like) but I also know that I may have 20+ years left if I have good health. Will he still remember me that long as spirit? I’m sorry if this is an odd question - I’m just really lonely and really want to be with him again but am afraid that I have to wait that long.
6 Likes
Oh gosh, very similar! I’m 50, and we were together for 23 yrs too. I am now just 7mths in, and learning that there may be a long time ahead, so i need to live. But i have the same questions, will he still be there when it’s my time, or will things have changed? The fear of the unknown. But i tell myself that i can’t know that yet, so i have to live a life, and just see where the road goes. I desperately want to be reunited with my husband when it’s my time, but so many questions as to whether that will be. I guess it’s not ours to decide, all we can try to control, is what we have here, on this mortal plain xxx
4 Likes
@Hoggy1, yeah, I think about the expected longevity and I’m nervous; I don’t foresee there ever being another one like him but yet the prospect of being alone for however long is also daunting. I don’t want anyone else but I also don’t want to be alone. I really only have one family member and she lives across the country. To be honest, I just wish I could speed up the process.
2 Likes
@Will_i_am - I am so sorry your beloved has died - that is such a big and horrible blow. You have come to the right place for support and advice, my friend.
Yours is a very good and important question and one that lots of us have asked, in a variety of ways. The way I see it is this - just my belief but it might help.
My husband Tom was not a believer in heaven, God or the afterlife. At all. After he died, I had intense impressions of him, being safe, being loved, being happy. Once, I believe, he came through to me to say that he was in a better place.
So - I think he is in heaven, with the whole company of heaven, all those all of us have loved and lost before. He is with his parents, friends, all those dear to him. He waits for me, for those he loved in life who are still here. We will be together again, in the pure unconditional Love that is heaven. Our framing of love and how it works will change when we get there - it is a place of unconditional and perfect love. Lean on that love your beloved holds for you for all time and I believe you will meet them again x
4 Likes
I’m 44 and I wonder the same.
I guess there’s no answer to it though 
Time is a human invention…it does not exist in reality…the consciousness does survive…time is not an issue…they will be there…it is us who are waiting…not them…
3 Likes
Yes, I get what you are saying. I also have a concern. If we are cremated, which my husband was and I will be, how can we meet up again, where-ever we end up? That really worries me, that everyone goes on about meeting in the afterlife but I just can’t see how that can ever be.
2 Likes
I really think that’s a big part of the fear we feel after loss, not just suddenly being alone, but whether we will ever see them again. I believe we will, that we are all on our individual life paths, but the other souls we are close to, that share our lives, are never far from us. We are parted at times, inevitably, but ultimately, I believe our spirits, souls, do meet again, i believe that it’s the soul that is immortal, our fragile earthly bodies will eventually fail, but not our energy 
4 Likes
Thank you. I so hope you are right!
1 Like
I lost my father when i was relatively young, he was just 53, and died suddenly. Some weeks later i was going through a hard time and felt a very firm, large, hand press down on my shoulder. I turned around and there wasn’t another person in the room. I knew it was my father. A few weeks later i met my husband
2 Likes
October 29th I lost my fiancé very suddenly, he was only 28 & im 26. I’m in a living nightmare, if I can keep myself going until I’m old I know I will see hi. Again. Depends what you believe but I found comfort in going to church. I have also been reading ‘the survival of the soul’ by Lisa Williams, you can buy on Amazon, it is all in hanging on to at the moment, everything I read & can imagine from the book is how I have always thought of heaven. Have a look online & if you chose to buy in sure you won’t regret it. I just wanted to know that he’s ok & still with me. Which I believe now more than ever. I hope it can make you feel even the tine’s it bit better
5 Likes
I have read the book, it is comforting, there is more to come, we just need to weather the storm that is the now 
3 Likes
Thank you for the suggestion. I think I will order the book. Anything will help. I’ve been without him now for 50 days as of today. I miss him so much so any comfort I can get by reading, I will. Thank you.
2 Likes
Hello Will_i_am….
I’m similar to you I was 50 when I lost Alan very suddenly….he went out to work one morning and never came home, so traumatic, you just can’t explain it to people.
I do believe our souls/spirit/conciousness
carry on…we are all connected…
I guess we all have to believe in something.
Alison
x
1 Like
Thank you. The more I read and listen (podcasts), the more I believe that he is now spirit and is all around me. I just can’t face the idea of being unable to be with him for that long. I woke up today and one of the first things I thought/realized is that I will probably never be loved like that again here. I have no kids and only a few “friends” but no love like that he gave me. It’s hard.
3 Likes
My partner died suddenly at 49, I was 57. He believed in nothing, lights out, gone. I didn’t feel him around for a long time but now I know he’s around, things that happen that can’t be justified. When I saw him at the morgue there was nothing in that room that was him, I even felt stupid talking to his body because he wasn’t there, just the vessel that held his spirit. I’ve seen some near death experiences and they are quite similar in that they say they knew they left their body but what made them who they were was still in them. A friend who met someone who had a near death experience said something that I thought explained it well, she said do you feel any different to how you felt when you were young, I said no, and often wondered when I would feel grown up lol. But it made sense that who I am will exist when I’m dead, just not in the body I have been given.
I saw a medium who said he was happy and he now believed as he had evidence. He said he would be the first one to greet me when it was my time, even if I met someone else.
Not everyone’s belief I know but it gives me comfort. So many things have happened to help me accept that he is around me, and his family.
Life questions are at the fore front of all of us because it’s hard to understand as we just don’t know and we want answers. But we just have to wait and see on this one.
3 Likes
I feel just the same as you….
I really don’t want to wait that long either!!
Also like you I have no children…
Alison
x
You sound very level and I will buy that book tomorrow.I’m quite sure your going to make it to the other side Best wishes to you