Well I’ve learnt a lesson today that you can’t rely on others like you did your husband, my son said he would help me fix the fences and now is too lazy and shouting at me saying I’m expecting too much from him and I have decided to do it myself, I’m very proud of myself I have sawn the wood taking it in small stages now I’m off to get some battens and hopefully fingers crossed it may work I feel sad because my husband and I were a great team fixing and maintaining the house but the lesson is to rely on myself now any which way I can, my son is a great disappointment and expects to live here freeloading at thirty, something else I need to sort out !!! But I need to stay positive and I actually feel my husband is with me in spirit egging me on to do well !!
Oh MAB,
Well said, how sorry I am that your son that lives with you doesn’t support you, maybe it’s time he moved to his own home then he might appreciate everything that needs doing round a home and help you more.
Doug and I used to do all the house maintenance together and losing them is like losing a limb you not whole any more.
But we are strong women, you will mend your fence and do many other jobs you never dreamed you would have to do and you will succeed.
I’ve had to learn how to maintain a pond, look after fish, treat the water and clean the pump, and many other things that Doug used to do and is now my responsibility.
My children will help if I ask them but I am an independent person and like to do it myself if I can. I know Doug is smiling and proud of some of the things I have achieved and I know your husband will be for you too.
Good luck with the fence.
Love Debbie X
I think the hardest thing we have to learn is the loneliness. I’m thinking of you both. Tell that lazy Arsenal son to get off his backside and help or show him the door and he will then find out what it’s like to fend for himself x
Dear Mab
so sorry for your loss ,I take my hat off to you for your courage to do these things yourself.Are you able to talk to your son he may be suffering from depression after losing his dad. My wife was taken from me 5months ago ,I didn’t want to do a thing for the first 3 months but I have got back to keeping the house tidy and other jobs and back at work but coming home to an empty house is horrible .I sure with time you can become best friends with your son.take care
Hi MAB
So sorry to read about your son not being the help and support he should be for you but well done for tackling it yourself. It’s amazing what we can do now we have to.
I think you need to have a good talk to him about it all. As someone has mentioned maybe he’s struggling a bit after the loss of his dad.
Good luck with the fence. You can do it xx
Thanks for your replies, I’ve repaired one panel and have made good two others I’ve learnt how to use an electric screwdriver and a hammer drill and realise why my husband never let me use them, he wanted them for himself as they’re quite exciting once you know what you’re doing, I think maybe it’s just getting used to doing these things and making it easier with power tools not being too scared to use them and yes maybe my son is depressed it’s a lot to deal with, emotionally and physically exhausting hugs to everyone xx