I’ve had an awful cold/flu bug in the last few days which is probably the first time I’ve been really poorly since I lost my husband in feb 2023.
I’m an only child and I’ve lost both my parents and my only daughter is away travelling, something she really needed to do since losing her dad.
I think I’m really feeling the loss of everyone but most of all my husband as I have no family around me and I feel very alone. I don’t want to call my friends as outwardly I look as though I’m coping but I’m not. All I heard when the first year anniversary passed was how much easier things will be now but if anything it’s worse. I’ve been so upset today and feel like everyone I care about (except my daughter) has gone and I’m left here to just exist, it’s just awful.
I’m so sorry you’re not feeling well. Grief and illness together really hits hard.
By sharing on here, you are connecting with people who understand what you’re
going through.
So I hope that helps.
The isolation is something I totally understand as I feel that as well.
I hope you get over the cold/ flu very quickly. Take care x
So sorry for your loss 
Hope you feel better soon. Maybe reach out to a friend and confide in them, telling them how you are truly feeling. Grief is heart wrenching we don’t need to be hiding how we are feeling, being brave is also about being vulnerable to help you through your grief journey.
I’m new here and find it a really supportive group, people who don’t judge and fully understand. Keep reaching out or just browse the topics I find it keeps my mind occupied.
Sending love and hugs xx
I too lost my husband in Feb 23 and hoped that things might start to get better once I’d got through the 1 year mark. Unfortunately, lately I’ve been feeling a lot worse. I don’t know if because now the reality has hit home or if it’s because “friends” have started to abandon me. I just think we have to give in to these feelings, admitting that you still miss them, despite others expecting you to be better now, is important. I don’t think you ever get over it, you just have to learn to cope especially if they were part of your life for a long time, I was with my Keef for nearly 44 years. I have family around who try and help/understand but at the end of the day they can never really understand how we feel. I now only socialise if I feel I can cope with all of the other couples and this varies on a daily basis. This forum really helps as we can talk to others who understand what it is we are going through. Take care and hope you feel better soon. Gail xx
Hi everyone yes I had a terrible day yesterday. I’m feeling very low. Been crying. I just wish things would start to improve but at the moment I am finding everyday life a struggle. I think I have some understanding of how everyone feels. Sending hugs.x
Thank you all for your kind replies, just knowing that how I feel is understood means a lot. The problem I have with reaching out to friends is that they’re not in this situation and don’t understand how hard it is. I’m 56 and relatively young to be a widow. Lots of friends still have both parents so luckily haven’t suffered a significant loss so i understand it’s not their fault but they can’t understand how devastating losing someone is, least of all your partner. And it’s not just losing the person it’s your future, having to do everything alone which I’m finding difficult. I think this weekend being ill and after caring for all my family at sometime suddenly find there’s no one here for me. I do realise that makes me sound a bit pathetic but it’s how I’ve felt. I’m feeling slightly better thank goodness.
Thank you so much again
I relate to what you say. It is very easy to become ill when under stress. I have Shingles which I am told can be brought on by stress - it is a very painful illness. I could not go out for 2 weeks and had no visitors during that time. My partner died 9 months ago and I feel very alone. I have no family and only 2 close friends who understand how I feel. I have lost motivation and find it hard to do things I used to like doing. Most days I suffer from depression. There are a few days that I feel better. Lets hope things will get better.
It doesn’t sound pathetic at all. X
Sending hugs
@flowergarden im so sorry you’ve been unwell for so long. 2 weeks must’ve felt like eternity to not see anyone. It really makes you realise how alone and vulnerable you are at times. I’m glad you have 2 friends that understand. I dosed myself up to pop to the shop today just to get out of the house as being in for so long isn’t helping how I feel. I have to say it wiped me out and I was glad to get back.
I think depression is very common after the loss of someone close. It’s not surprising when you’re left feeling isolated and alone and as the situation won’t change it takes a very long time to be able to adapt to it.
I hope you’re feeling better and managing to see friends when you can, take care xx