It’s been a little over 18 months since my partner passed and this second year has been more difficult - I seem stuck on the fixation of my partner’s passing every moment when I’m not distracted by something whilst friends and family move on
Then this weekend has been one where a few friends and acquaintances have lost close relatives. As well as thinking about them and their loss I find that it’s taken me back to the early days after I lost my partner.
I’ve also said that I’ll try to get to the funeral of one as we are very good friends and knew the family well.
It will be the first funeral that I will attend since my partner’s and I have to admit to being a little apprehensive. How have others coped with funerals after the funeral of their partner? Or am I just overthinking things again?
Dear @Wisteria
Hello, I haven’t had to think about that yet.
And I really don’t know how I will feel when the inevitable happens.
I think it will depend on who it is, and maybe even more significant where it is.
I think I would find it really, really difficult to go back to the crematorium where my husband had his farewell service.
@Wisteria Hi. I went to my brothers funeral 11 months after my husband had died . I found it really difficult deciding whether to go . But it was my brother. I thought that day was about my brother not me and my grief . It was at the same crem . I was being so brave . But as his coffin went in , they played the same song i had chose for my husbands funeral . As you can imagine it all came flooding back and i ended up in a right state …i did manage to get through the funeral .but as soon as it was over i left and went back to my house . Couldnt go to the celebration of his life . I also found the second year much harder than the first . The reality of this is my life now set in .where as the first year i was still numb . It will be three years this september since my husband died , my happy life ended. I still have some really bad days . But have learned how to drag myself out of the deep pit i often find myself . No you are not overthinking at all . It will bring triggers . Hopefully you are able to cope with them .sending hugs xtake carex
Unless tou reslly have to go i wouldnt go persinally … its just a trigger for you . Trt not to get too involved because you got enough on dealing with your own grief. Take care xx
