Advice needed

Hello all

Need some advice. I lost my partner last january he was an identical twin. Our daughter was 18 months when her father passed she has seen photos and videos of him everyday since then. Over christmas we had his brother over and out of the blue she has started calling him daddy. It has really thrown me we see him every few weeks and she has never said it before. Now i dont know how best to handle this obvioulsy being a twin to her they are very alike and his family tell me to go along with it until shes older but i dont know how her little mind is working and thinking and i worry entertaining this is only going to confuse her more. She will be 3 in may. Also the selfish part of me dies a little inside everytime i hear her call him it hes not her dad her dad is gone and even tho hes gone he is still her daddy. if anyone has gone through similer any advice would be amazing.
Thank you


Wow … thats a difficult one ! I have identical twin brothers so i know your dilemma ! Poor little girl it must be really confusing for her ? I would be tempted to get professional help for this one - can you ask your dr about it cos its really hard what to do for the best … xx


@brown87 this is so sad to read. I have no experience of this but I would try to explain the truth as simply as possible. I read a lot about how to tell a child a loved one has died or is going to die (for my grandchildren) when my husband passed away and the advice was always to be honest but explain in the simplest of terms. Like @Deb5 says it might be worth getting expert advice. Take care.


Oh you poor thing, and your little daughter.
I agree with getting professional advice.

But also , maybe If there are photos of your husband and his brother as adults together , show her these , and point out one is her daddy and one is her uncle.

Lots of love :heart::heart::hugs::hugs:


That’s a great idea to show her the photos and explain to her.

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Being a mother of twins, I would definitely go with the photo and if she says daddy, say no uncle Gary or whatever his name is and then go back to the photos at the same time, pointing them out, good luck xx