Advice

3 months ago today I lost my mum. So very suddenly to a cardiac arrest caused by a lung condition. Until she was very active and independent. She suffered with anxiety which is what we thought it was. She was diagnosed with copd about 4 years ago. My sister found some tablets at mums that she was prescribed by the doctor to help with anxiety. However it states do not take if wheezy. Mums copd had not been an issue. She walked her dog daily and like I said was active. She didn’t struggle to breathe. I’ve looked into this drug and copd and it says it should not be given and it can basically make lungs worse and she should of had regular breathing check ups. Maybe I’m just angry and looking to blame. I don’t know. Didn’t help ambulance took half an hour to attend to someone with cardiac arrest either. I don’t understand why the doctors would of prescribed her these tablets. Even though it was too late cos of being gone too long (waiting for ambulance) her lungs were recovering in hospital and her heart was ok also. Sorry. I’m not sure what I want here: I only found out today from my sister that the hospital said her lungs were recovering and were a lot better than when she went in and her heart was also ok.
Sorry for going on. This has upset and confused me and left me wondering why I don’t have a mum anymore. I’ve spent 3 months blaming myself.
Nic

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Nic, this is so very new and raw since your mum died. You can’t blame yourself for something that was totally out of your control. The guilt will eat you up. I can understand your anger and wanting to blame someone.
Have you and your sister thought about writing to your mum’s GP to ask why they prescribed that drugs. Be prepared they might not respond, I wrote to the hospital asking about my husband’s last biopsy before died and they never replied.
Medications are a nightmare, Doug had COPD amongst many other conditions always a fine balancing act between helping one condition against another.
Please be kind to yourself, we can all do the what if’s, don’t torture yourself, just remember how much you love your mum and she loves you.
Love and hugs
Debbie X X

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