My husband’s funeral was on Friday. It was a lovely service and a really good turnout for a lovely man. Now the funeral is over I am struggling. What the point of getting up to count down the munutes till i go back to bed. I have hia ashes and found cuddling them helps for a while. I stay home then I want to be out, I go out and want to be home. Its’s the most awful feeling ever. So lonely, watching everyone getting on with their lives and getting ready for Christmas. I am fed up of people telling my I’m so strong because I’m not and if they looked at me then they would realise. I have a lovely son but feel that my world has fallen apart and I have no idea what to do.
Sorry for your loss.
It’s such a tough time just after the funeral, when the rest of the world starts turning again except you can’t get back on.
I am nearly 1 year in from the loss of my wife, all I can say is time will help.
Try hard to just look after yourself each day, the basics of eating well and resting, get fresh air. You don’t need to do anymore than that until you are ready.
Thank you for taking the time to respond. It is really hard especially this time of year when everyone is getting read to celebrate and all I want to do is hide under the duvet. Thank you again.
I was dreading the day of the funeral but actually felt comfort from it as it was a celebration of my husband’s life and felt the love and friendship everyone who came had for him. But the days after I felt so low as it feels so final, everyone else is getting on with their own lives and but I wasn’t and the loss was and is still there and weighing everyday on me. It is so hard. I have a 15 old son so have to carry on for him but every morning, I wish I didn’t have to get up.
My sympathies for your loss. Being in the days after the funeral of my dad I understand the struggle afterwards. ![]()
Im sorry for your loss. I feel exactly the same, have to drag myself out of bed. Can only manage to do a few tasks every day which is not like me. I kust miss him so much and cant bear it. It can be a cruel life.
I’m sorry for your loss as well. I am almost 7 weeks in. It is so hard to carry on the day to day tasks. I have had to resume work as I have to keep paying the bills and I find that almost impossible. I try though and luckily my employer has allowed me to to a phased return but I have zero motivation. Stay strong x
Reading through this thread, it all seems so raw, so sorry for your loss folks.
I mentioned I am approaching a year since the loss of my lovely wife Marie. Your feelings are all so familiar. I went back to work within a couple of weeks after the funeral and concluded quickly it was good for me, staying busy, meeting people etc
One thing or another though I think I am hitting a wall as I approach the 1 year anniversary of her passing (Jan 18). I recently had a bike accident and got a TBI apparently takes 6 months to recover and off work for a couple of months. All seems to be culminating in a real dip.
I am investigating counseling for the first time and it prompted me to join this forum.
What do I mean by all of this - just that please look after yourself, I know it is hard but a walk in the park or a nice meal, plenty rest, whatever pleasure or comfort you can find to help you as the days,weeks & months go by.
Oh dear I’m sorry to hear this. I hope you have a speedy recovery. I’ve not gone back to work yet and i work from home. Im going to try do what I can when I can but i do find it difficult esp this time of year. Thank you for replying, everyones experiences help in their own way which i greatly appreciate people sharing. All the best with the counselling and hope it helps.
My husband’s funeral was today. It was attended by only four people, myself and my three adult children. My husband and I were very close for our 50 years of marriage, and did not socialise, so we had no friends there. I miss his masculine presence in our house. It was this alone that made it a home. Now it is nothing more than four walls where I am condemned to live out the remainder of my mortal existence, which I hope will be short. Every day I told him how much I loved him, hugged him and kissed his face. All this is now over and I am alone. I do not know what the future holds. I have joined the Ramblers Association and will join the University of the Third Age tomorrow, just to break the awful isolation, loneliness and lack of structure that now dominate my life. But it all seems somehow just mere destraction, while I myself wait for death.