I sometimes think if I spend anymore time in the house on my own I will go mad. We used to love going out for lunch together so I think it will make me feel better but I usually just come home and cry.xx
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Aw … i know … nothing is the same anymore is it ? Not one damn thing ! Its so hard and qe didnt ask for any of this did we ? I think thats what makes it so hard to bear 
its not as if we walked out and left them is it or as if we ever had any choice in all this … cant you take a friend with you ? Mind u theyre few and far between aren’t they … proper friends that is … the ones who stand by u when the chips are down can you join a group to make some friends ? xx
You sound to be in the same boat as me everything is so stressful when they dealt with all that kind of stuff.I have lots of small jobs need doing that he would have sorted out and it’s all so stressful.I hope you get your boiler sorted.
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Small steps yes but it kept you occupied.I try to plan an extra job a day just to keep me going.I spend hours looking at all our photographs I actually love them they bring back so many good memories.I know a lot of people find looking at the photos hard but they make me smile.
Yeh my husband supported me so much in everything i did… thats what i miss … that support ;( feeling it today … Easter and no husband here to love … x
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I don’t have any friends. The ones I had all disappeared after the funeral. They said we will keep in touch but they never have and I gave up ringing and hearing them say that they would arrange something knowing that they never would. If I meet anyone in the street they can’t wait to walk on. I don’t have any confidence anymore so joining a group just seems so hard. Xx
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I know what you mean about friends, I have had the same happen as well as his family saying the same. I dont have contact now with Robs family or old friends. It’s hard meeting new people, but worth it. The hard bit is making the first contact, once done it gets easier.
Try your local WI group or maybe check out the local library or community centre for anything happening in your area.
Oh yeh i had a so called friend who did that to me ! So selfish isnt it ! Im not friends with her anymore ! You certainly find out who your friends are dont you ? For sure … well you started by making friends on here so that’s a start xx
Im feeling guilty at the moment. I lost my beautiful wife 9 months ago today. Lately I’ve been drinking a bit I know I shouldn’t. I’m guilty because I don’t know what my wife would think of me if she knew I miss her so much
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I have tried going to church group. I am not religious but I thought that it would be a way of meeting people. I go to the coffee group there and enjoy it but I wouldn’t say I have made any particular friends. I have mobility problems and can’t drive so I don’t go far. The church is just down the road so it’s easy. I have tried looking for the WI but there aren’t any local to me. The nearest one I could get a bus to town but there would still be quite a walk. I will have a look in the library though. I have found since I joined this community I actually feel like I have a reason to get up and get my iPad. Xx
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I know exactly what you mean. I never used to drink but since my partner died I have been drinking a bottle of wine every night until 2 nights ago when I decided I had to stop. I felt my partner would have been so unhappy that I was doing that but it is hard. The amount of times in the past two days when I’ve put my shoes on because I wanted to get some but instead I have come online and found people who are going through the same thing
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Aw … im dure she would understand you know … its really crap what we are going through now without them. Just try and curb it and u will feel better anyway. Alcohol is a depressant you know but its ok to have some now and again isnt it ? X
Ive a cupboard full of wine and other bits but found since Rob passed, I dont want it. I’ve had an odd glass of wine, and then had to throw the rest away.
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No-one who has not experienced bereavement understands. I think the majority of people who think they would be OK would not cope. I have lost a friend over it when I told her that I wish I had a family to help me. She said I should have made more friends!
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only child, lost both parents.
now I belong to a singles group at the church, monthly writers dinner, astronomy club, swim at the high school … and now trying online dating.
it was the only way but this took me a few years. I have one place I go for a wine and a taco and am very comfortable there. was an old haunt of me and mom and dad. met some nice people now … but it has taken over five years. but time goes anyway.
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Well done ! You made good progress … my bwreavment counsellor said its like an egg… the yoke is the grief and gradually the white bit is our life qnd we gradually start to build one but we never completey lose the grief it just gets smaller as time goes by … xx
Like you I feel overwhelmed and anxious when dealing with problems like finances. Even filling the car with petrol which my husband always did. Having to sort things and coping with grief is just too much to bear. My husband died Feb 2024 and I miss him terribly even though he didn’t do much the last two years because he felt ill, he was there. It’s heartbreaking the tears fall everyday I miss male company.
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Oh yeh i know exactly what you mean. All those things. Doing stuff without them, coping with everything alone, missing a man in your life to calm you down when things go wrong … But youre very early days so just be kind to yourself - it will very slowly get easier xx
Still early days for you. You will have good days and bad days, do a little each day and it will feel like you’ve accomplished lots. X
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Yeh that saying - baby steps - so very true in our situation … just putting one foot in front of the other xx