Hello everyone. So many sad and traumatic stories, but one common heart ache… and my god it hurts. In a year I have lost two of my best friends in their fifties and my beautiful mum. She had leukaemia, a short illness for 9 months and I’m certain like you all I’m traumatised and totally devastated.
A year on and I’m worse than I was at the beginning, I’m all over the place. Its 6.30am in the UK and I haven’t slept all night because I’m scared of the silence and room to think when I hit the pillow.
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Hi just wanted to reach out and tell you I’d read your post and thinking of you 
I don’t have much advice as I only lost my mum on new year’s day suddenly. She was 83 and died peacefully in her own home just like she wanted to but the shock of it being so unexpected has flawed me. Only 3 hours before I’d been there having a cuppa and putting her Christmas decorations back on the loft for her. I’ve had awful anxiety since but got some meds off the doc. Only on day 9 so hopefully they’ll kick in soon. Went out on a fell walk yesterday which helped but I do find night times hard. Hope you are able to get some rest. Sending love
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Thank you Titch that’s much appreciated.
Perhaps comforting that your mum died in her own home but no comfort that she has gone…and age doesn’t matter, she was your mum.
I’m not sure if I want, need, like being on here. Does it bring the raw reality to the surface or does it share the load?
Certainly your message shared the load tonight. Thank you.
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Hello,
I lost mum 10 weeks ago after a short illness and dad 10 days ago very suddenly. I’m very early into my grief journey so don’t have advice. Unpicking the issues left behind and the sadmin is exhusting.
Somehow reading everyones stories and supporting one another has provided some small comfort. I had mum and dad for 42 years. They had each other for 57 years. Not everyone is so lucky, so I’m just trying to focus on the love they gave me and my brothers. It’s so hard though. I think I will get some meds soon as i can’t sleep at all. I have therapy hopefully in 3 months time.
Sending a virtual hug. Rob x
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Just a little note say that I’m reaching out to you as I hear what a traumatic time you have had and how I understand you must be reeling after such sadness.
I too am not sleeping.
It seems simple but yesterday I walked a lot and I was purposely busy to help physically and mentally. I put down my phone from well meaning messages in the evening. I had a better sleep last night. Be good to yourself and do stuff that helps you, you have a bumpy road ahead. 
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