My husband passed away in early May 2026 from a sudden cardiac arrest. He had absolutely no history, underlying conditions, or red flags. He was 33. It’s been almost two months. Even though I had about two weeks of better mood, where I felt a bit more like myself, I was eating okay, moving about etc. It all came crashing down around father’s day. I felt like I went back to that room where the doctors gave me the news. That same feeling of adrenaline coarsing through my body. My stomach is in knots and I can barely eat. My chest feels crushed by a slab and I can literally feel my heart aching. My mind is SO loud all the time. I am indifferent about everything else and cannot find it in myself to feel sympathy for anyone’s trivial problems.
I thought mental health would be prioritised for bereavement but the closest assessment appointment I could get is two months from now.
Even though I show up, get up everyday and get shit done, it’s all just eating me up. Whatever I am doing I am nust not able to calm the chest pains at all. It’s the worst feeling of grief, sadness, guilt, yearning, fear, dreading the loss of my soulmate’s companionship and love at such a young age…
The more people who step in to support, the more helpless I feel and the bigger his void feels. I am having to do and learn things out of necessity all while grieving (like driving) and sort out a full time position for stability.
I don’t know what I’m seeking exactly, maybe advice? Comfort? My whole life along with our young kids has just been flipped upside down literally within minutes and it’s barely been two months but I am absolutely drained both physically and mentally.
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Morning @Noahsjourney
I am sorry you find yourself in this position. my husband was the same, died suddenly of a heart attack. He never been ill and it was a huge shock. My husband was older than your husband he was 64 just days before his 65 birthday. I am now 9 months into this journey. You’re right you do have to learn new things. What was once the roles of 2 people, now become one person roles .The first few months for me were the worst , slowly I started to have better days . Although I do have days when I am down. I have good support from my and daughter in law . Do you have family and friends around you to support you . There are some lovely people on here who will give you support. Shout , rant and for advice anything there will always be someone along to help you . I know it’s difficult please look after yourself.
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Dear Noahsjourney I am so sorry to hear your pain. The pain one feels when your loved dies is the most unbearable feeling which is not just sentimental, it’s a physical pain as if you are being ripped apart or hit by a train. The first two or three months were by far the worst for me,most of it now seems lost in a cloud of suffering. When my wife died six months ago I used exercise as a form of control apart from spending hours walking in nature, when I felt the feelings of pain rise up I would do pull-ups or lift a weight I have, taking the pain out on myself. It helps as it reduces the cortisol in the body which causes that shaking feeling of anxiousness.
Finding this site was a godsend as it allowed me to post my feelings and find others who understand what I was feeling.
I hope you find some solace here
Wishing you all the strength you need and sending hugs
All the best
Tom
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I’m sorry for your loss, I lost my partner nine months ago and I still struggle. It is normal for someone grieving to feel as you do. That painful empty void is all consuming. Your grief is still so very early. At your stage my mind was full of racing thoughts and I couldn’t sleep well. I had to force myself to eat. For me the worst thing was the anxiety and feeling shaky which was worse in the morning. Grief comes in waves, sometimes you feel a little better then something triggers it again. It could be a memory, photos, music or just a conversation about your loved one. It’s good you have support, as with two young children it would be even more difficult if you were completely alone.
I wish I could say you’ll feel better soon but the grief path is hard and rocky. Take one day at a time, do only what is essential and accept help. Keep posting, and take care.
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Sorry for your loss. I’m at 3 months mark and finding the past week, since Fathers’ Day the hardest. Maybe Fathers’ Day was the trigger.
It must get easier. It can’t be like this forever, that’s what I keep telling myself and hoping others who are further down the line can tell us everything will be ok.
Sending hugs 
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Hi I m so sorry for your loss. What you’re feeling is completely normal for someone who is grieving. Grief comes in waves, you think you’re a bit better but there it is. Waiting for you around the corner.
If the anxiety is really bad your GP might be able to prescribe you something to take the edge off it. Accept help when offered but don’t let anyone bully you into doing something you don’t want to do. You will need help with the children if you are working full time. I hope the coming months are kinder to you. Take care.
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