Hi All

First time posting.

Is anybody else completely on their own without any local family? I’m isolating myself and depression is setting in. Due to lots of major family bereavements and divorce, I’m now on my own and its a VERY lonely place to be :pensive:
I’ve lost the generation above ( parents had me late so I’m years in front of many my age ) alot of my generation due to my divorce and the generation below as my daughter is not in my life atm.
My dad passed away 2 years ago and was the last local family member. I live on my own, am waiting to start a job with an agency and foolishly stopped going to a support group which was helping my mental health.

I’m just hoping that a new work environment will help. In the meantime, I’m being gentle with myself, messaging friends, getting my house nice, and trying to get out abit but it becomes a vicious circle of " No one / nothing to have to go out for "
I’ve spent 10 years living as the only adult and keep my house lovely but motivation sometimes is lacking as its a " burden " or chores that can’t be shared with anybody ( I was 13 years married and with him over 20 years so remember " sharing the load " )
I’m also missing my relationship which ended a few months ago. Too many losses all round!


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Hello @Phoenix36,

It sounds like you’ve been through an awful lot - thank you for sharing your story with us. I really hope you find the community to be a support to you.

I’m just giving your thread a gentle bump - hopefully someone will be along to to share their thoughts.

Take care :blue_heart:

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Hi Seaneen,

Thankyou for replying.

Yes I have been through alot. It was just myself and dad at the end and so it’s a massive void without losing everyone else.

I was also in charge of sorting his estate which has kept me busy. Until a couple of months ago. Now the loneliness has set in :pensive:


@Phoenix36 don’t give up, keep on keeping on, even though it’s hard. I completely empathise as although I live with my teenage son, I often feel quite isolated. My Mum was always the person who I would share my thoughts with and since her sudden death back in January I have felt a real void. A good friend is struggling with her treatment for cancer so I can’t really impose on her. Colleagues are always busy it seems as well, so sometimes I do feel there’s no one there for me. Have you considered rejoining the group? What about volunteering somewhere? I’m considering this, I just need to get my Mum’s estate admin finished with. Best wishes xx

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Hi Phoenix36,
I was scrolling and I saw the title of this post and it caught my attention.

I lost my wife on the 31st October and the feeling of being alone is so intense right now.

My wife was my rock and my world for 27 years since I was 16 and without her I am lost.

I have lots of people offer support but it’s just not the same.

The thought of not holding her hand or cuddling up on the sofa at the end of a evening for the rest of my life is destroying me.

If anyone has any suggestions on ways to deal with the feeling I would love to hear it.



Moore18 I lost my wife in June and though from the sound of things I’m a great deal older than you I have found that keeping my mind occupied shortens the time I have to think. I have for example put a crossword word book everywhere I’m likely to be inactive. By my chair in my bedroom along side my Kindle on the dining table even in the loo. Fortunately I enjoy doing all types of puzzles, so this works for me. There’s only one thing comes to mind when you’re on the road that we are all treading and that is the huge loss we are suffering. So reducing the time I have to stop and think is to me helpful.
Best of luck in finding your solution.



I am so sorry about the loss of your wife.

You were together a very long time and she has been gone no time at all in comparison so everything you are feeling is completely understandable.

Eldento has made a good suggestion. I don’t tend to distract myself enough at times and end up getting very unmotivated, and feeling worse. I’m much better being proactive! It’s hard to keep pushing ourselves - or to know what the best thing for us is.
For me, I know I have to get out more! Even if it’s just for a walk. I’ve just spent 4 whole weeks indoors!! I don’t think I’ve EVER done that!! Of course it was so much harder to get out again and as I suffer from anxiety too, I was VERY anxious!! However the hardest part was getting out the door! I spent 2 hours out and it helped so much!

Small steps and be gentle with yourself. I’m finding this group helps.

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