Alzheimer’s

Losing a partner
1

I tried to look after my husband of 62 years at home for about 4 years . He had Alzheimer’s disease. He slowly disappeared but then
He got an infection and was taken to hospital where he died 5 days later on 38th December last year.
I don’t know what to do with myself

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Sending you a big hug :heart: and so sorry for your loss. After 62yrs of marriage you take all the time you need and be kind to you. There is no need to put yourself under pressure knowing what to do with yourself just do what you are able to do, hour by hour, day by day and count your blessings that you had a lifetime together with all those memories of the love you shared, some people will never get to a few years of marriage let alone 62 years. What an incredible lady you are and your husband was a lucky man. Love never dies and you need to surround yourself with all the love he left you with. When your heart hurts, know it is him squeezing it tight with all his love telling you it’s all okay. Reach out to people, talk about him and accept all offers of help and support. You will be ok, I promise xx

3

I empathise totally with you. My husband of 54 years also had Alzheimers and it spoiled our last years together because of the emotional trauma. He died 18 months ago from a heart related problem and subsequent delirium which dementia patients sometimes get after an illness. My heart like yours is utterly broken and i know I will never ever get over the loss of him whatever other people might say about how it gets easier. i have moved house to live a bit nearer to my sons and their families but nothing has helped at all. Sending you a heartfelt hug.

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My husband also had Alzheimers. Such a terrible disease. He died 4 months ago after almost 64years of marriage - together for 70 years. I know we were so lucky to have had such a long time together but I sometimes feel the longer we have them the harder it is to say goodbye. I am finding life so terribly hard without him.
I send you all my love and sympathy.

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I feel the same; the longer we have them the harder it is . Not everyone would agree if they have lost their husband’s very early on but it is so terribly hard after a long and happy marriage and in old age to try and carry on. I ( like all of you) am really struggling every day and seem to dread getting up each day. I have a lovely dog but she is old too and that is the only reason I get up in the morning. it is just so dreadful… purpose in life seems to have gone. My sympathy and love to all of you. Yes Alzheimers is the cruellest disease. Just heart breaking to see our once young and fit and clever husbands become these odd and undignified people and it is a lonely illness with no communication skills and confusion which seems to make people avoid visiting. I struggled so much emotionally and became a person I didn’t know or like for which i will always have terrible guilt.