I lost my wonderful husband 18 months ago, he was only 52 and we were so close we did everything together. I nursed him at home and was with him as he passed. I have been in a bad way , the first year was horrendous, with painful memories and I felt I had no purpose or future, I was very unwell with physical and mental effects of grief. Now I’m in a place where I know it has eased a little , I’m going places, doing nice things and trying to build myself a life without him, it’s scarey,. My issue now is I cry less and laugh more and then I suddenly realise I haven’t cried in over 2 weeks , what’s wrong with me ? I’m in a very strange place feeling so guilty and angry with myself for not crying enough and for being here when he isn’t.
Hi Sabrina69,
I have read your post with interest. I am also 18 months in. I have not managed to go two weeks without crying, but it doe feel strange when you go days without crying. Yes things still hit me and I can have bad wave days. I still miss my Sue,but I can laugh at things. The first time I felt so guilty. You don’t have anything to feel guilty about. We are learning a new way to live with out our soul mate, and yes we will always grieve them. Yet we have to try and live ourselves. No matter how hard it is.
Take care.
Hello Sabrina69, sorry for your loss, im glad that you are having better moments in your life, don’t feel guilty, you hafta enjoy life. Laugh more cry less..our husband’s would want that..i lost my husband in March..keep having good days, God bless you 
Know exactly what you mean,not as far in as you.well done for getting so far