Hello all
I’m newly widowed it’s been 12 days
My husband passed away suddenly one minute he was with me chatting etc the nxt he was taking his last breath in my arms he passed away due to a massive heart attack.
I’m 56 and traumatised by this passing when my mam passed I had time to come to terms with the eventual passing as she had ovarian cancer but this is another level
I’m eating only because I have to I’m diabetic so going into a diabetic coma is not what my family needs at anytime however I’m not sleeping or sleeping for an hr or two
We decided months ago that we didn’t want a funeral so he’s with a direct cremation and we are having a get together when he gets home
The anger is the worst I feel so damn guilty for being angry when I know it wasn’t his fault for passing like this
How do I navigate this ? when all I want to do is burn the world down
I cannot stand the deafening silence at night my daughters are grown with families of their own and they are with me as much as I want them to be but early hrs of the morning it’s me and my elderly cat who spends her time crying after her dad
I’m going to ring the drs when they open see if they can help me sleep as I have benefits etc to sort out and that paralyses me am so afraid of everything atm
I know it’s very new to me but I cannot imagine my life without him for the nxt god knows how many years and no am not suicidal I suffer already with anxiety and depression but this is making me feel so isolated anyways I don’t know what am trying to say and have waffles long enough many thanks for listening
I am so sorry you have lost your husband. This is a road non of us want to tread but unfortunately that’s where we find ourselves.
A sudden death is so traumatising for us left behind but no matter which way our partners have passed we all suffer the same feelings.
My John passed away suddenly in March and I was in a fog for a long time not knowing what to do and I couldn’t make decisions about anything but family and friends helped such a lot. I am one of the lucky ones having those people around me. Some on here have no one.
Yes you’ll feel anger but that will fade in time and it’s worse when you can’t sleep so hopefully your doctor will sort something for you.
Keep eating n drinking when you can and post on here, it does help.
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