So now is the time I experience the first anniversaries.
This month a year ago we got the news the cancer had come back and this time Nancy could not beat it.
Next month was when Nancy left the house for the last time , we did not know it at the time.
Then May when Nancy died.
The first one hurt so much but Nancy did not cry.
The second one we were unaware that this would be the last time Nancy would be at home but Nancy did not cry.
The day she died I was so lucky to be with Nancy due to the fantastic team at Mountbatten for 4 hours to tel Nancy how lucky I was to be with Nancy for 32 years.
Plus to tell Nancy how much I loved her and how everyone who met her loved her.
Neither us of cried.
I have cried ever since xxxx

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Your words speak of courage, love and great sadness. Thank you for sharing your tragic experience. You will find many here who have had similar tragedies and if you can I would encourage you to read some of their posts. I did and it has helped me to put some things into a better perspective. I still feel very sad but knowing I’m not alone has helped a lot. You are not alone whilst you are here and being here with us might help you get through these anniversaries that you are facing. I hope so.
Best wishes.

Thank you for responding, sometimes you feel like is it me , am I just trying to make it about me, so strange but I just want to say how it is. Bat crazy !!

I’ve thought that many times.
Everyone grieves differently though and it is you feeling this pain in this moment.
Others will have pain too and will be facing it in their own way so for now it is all about you and that isn’t in the least bit selfish, it’s a matter of perspective and it doesn’t stop us from respecting what others are going through.

Look after yourself.