Anxiety after bereavements

Losing a parent
21

And I send support back to you. X

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22

Three months since I lost my husband of 57 years. I too had few days away and coming home to a quiet empty house was horrendous. I am suffering with anxiety now, & panic attacks so I have every sympathy.

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23

Sending you support Abbiesnan . Here if I can help, take care .

24

Thank you xx

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25

Grief just never goes away I lost my mum in 2021 than dad three weeks later and after that my sister in law passed 2023 I between that other relatives passed you just think your never going to catch a break who next sort of thing you never recover from it but you have to deal with it . Sometimes I like to think mum and dad just live aboard. But I think that my way of dealing with things . But that empty feeling is just horrible

26

I do I have been having a hard time since losing my dad 18 months ago just suddenly worrying about choking this is stopping me from eating solid food and holding liquids in my mouth and having to blend my food had a load of tests done Iā€™m only just turning 36 Iā€™m a nervous wreck itā€™s just awful anyone else ever experienced this itā€™s dreadful big hugs to everyone xx

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27

So sorry to hear this. It is very hard to deal with. I hope you can find some help xx

28

Hi Snowhite26
Youā€™ve hit the nail on the head, the empty feeling is awful.
We lost our parents 4 months apart, which is awful, but I canā€™t imagine how you feel dealing with the loss of both within 3 weeks.
Iā€™m beginning to think I wonā€™t ever be the same again. The grief process is slow and relentless.
Sending support your way.

29

Hi Emma1988
So sorry anxiety is affecting you in this way, I hope it eases soon.

30

Yip it is. Not easy. Some days I still have my moments and for me you donā€™t really want to say how you really feel . Because some people think you should just get on with it which is true but it really hard

31

Ignore those people, you are entitled to your feelings.
We all grieve differently.

32

I had a bad day and couldnā€™t face meeting two old friends in a cafe who still have their husbands. They donā€™t understand and I couldnā€™t face listening to all their chatter about what they are doing. Same when my dad died but that was years ago. I recall going to my friendā€™s trying to get away from how I felt but she expected me to want to be with her all the time and I wanted to have time alone a lot not listen to them telling me what I ought to feel or minimising it. In fact just wanted freedom

33

This is just the conversation I needed to read just now. My Dad died last summer after six months in hospital and now Iā€™m terrified of something happening to my Mum. She has more health issues than he ever had and now, every time she doesnā€™t reply to a txt or I see she hasnā€™t been active on WhatsApp, I think the worst!

34

Hi Catz17

So sorry for your loss and for how you are feeling.
Just know that what you are feeling is normal. I have no wise words, I think we just pick our way through grief at our own pace .
Take care and keep posting, there is a lot of support here .

35

I can relate to that, especially in the weeks before Christmas when I lost my Nan, Mum and Grandad. They all died in December one year after the next, in the 1980ā€™s. Now I donā€™t start Christmas until after my Nans birthday, which was Dec 19th, and I still find it irritating when people call me a misery in December. I just need to get past those dates before I can relax.

36

I fell the same in December my mum was 21 dec then my sister in law 24 December then my dad January am glad when itā€™s all over

37

Yes Christmas been tricky missing family all dead or go elsewhere apart from my son.
But been flat like that for years now
I think it is nuts now everyone is in debt because of it and I think how silly to be like that in January.
Should listen to Martin Lewis what he tells everyone.
The. I end up with stuff that is unsuitable. I feel bad then because I am thinking it.
This dance we do seems crazy.

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38

Donā€™t feel bad or guilty for doing things your way and want to cope, Enorac, we all grieve in different ways. It is okay to do things differently to help us through those difficult times. We all just need to share our life with others when we feel good or when we can at other times of the year too. Martin Lewis is right about debt after Christmas. I buy too much by panic buying at the last minute, which is probably not what our loved ones would want for us but it does last through the winter months and the sun shines again. X

39

We all need to just do whatā€™s best in order to navigate our grief.
Burying my Mum two weeks before Christmas Day meant we had a low key Christmas. No one noticed or bothered. We just stayed home and enjoyed a quiet day , just the 4 of us who live here . Our youngest son is married and has a young son, he lives away from home. The highlight of our day was his FaceTime.

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