I have now developed so anxious specially when it comes to bed time I can’t seem to. Drop. Off I think things are going to happen.to me in the night also I have recurring dreams that I can’t shift in my brain why has grief affected me so badly my friend said I should be getting better by now trying to sort out what type of life I’m going to have my grief counsellor said not to listen to other people,s opinions just listen to my body I’m so confused
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Sandypaws022
I lost my husband to liver cancer on 7 Nov last year.
I totally understand how you are feeling. Grief is a dreadful thing we did not know hits so very hard deep into the soul.
Days are long and lonely nights longer still. Sleep is not easy I agree but we have nothing to fear. Our husbands are watching over us guiding us supporting us physically they have left us yet spiritually they remain. They will keep us safe and help us to live this new life we now find ourselves in.
We are still in the early stages of facing this grief storm each person finds their own place and ability to cope through this.
You will be ok there is no time limit as to how we feel only those experiencing such loss can know. You are not alone we are all here to help one another.
I send you a big hug and again say you will be ok give yourself time. 
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Hi Sandypaws
I hope you don’t mind me saying but if your friend hasn’t been through this awful experience, she has no right to say you should be getting better by now! It’s so different for everyone. You have to do what is right for you and don’t listen to anyone else.
It’s over 6 months now for me and the least little thing can set me off crying. The anxiety is still there on and off, and I just miss Ray so much. I’m scared for the future in a way that I never was. I think it’s because our husbands totally ‘got us’ and being with them was the safety net we were used to. Ah it’s just such a hard road to be on.
Take good care x
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Hello, I agreee no one can tell you to move on, I know by experience. My mother in law died last April, and my husband would grieve months later, I never said anything to him about it, but I always thought that it was time he started feeling better. Now my husband has passed and I think I will mourn him for the rest of my life, and you’re right my husband was my safety net, my future my everything, now im lost without him. I’m going to the cemetery today to put my husband to rest. May you all find some peace today knowing that our husbands are still looking out for us.
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Sorry for your loss but your friend is not being very helpful or kind. Anxiety is very common in grief. Your life has totally changed as well as having lost someone. Has your friend ever been in this position herself because she’s just an outsider looking in otherwise? I’m at the seven months stage and I cry even more than the early days, I also feel very vulnerable being on my own. I think the shock and numbness protects you a bit in the early months but once reality starts kicking in you realise that this is your life now. That’s not to say you won’t feel better eventually, but it will probably be a long road to travel. Personally I tell people I’m not the same person any more. I can’t abide trivia and I care less about things I was previously interested in.. Mostly they don’t understand. Someday they might be in a similar position then they will know how hard it is.
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