Anyone awake again?

Good evening all I’m new just like to ask is there anybody up for a chat xx

Hi everyone, my wife died a couple of day’s ago. With all them restrictions on us I am really suffering at the moment. . I live in an isolated area in Scotland. The funeral folks have been fantastic, but I need company. Not possible in the world we are in. Living on my own is hell. Just need to talk to and see people.

Hi I’m so so so heartbroken for you I too lost my partner 10 days ago this COVID 19 is making things a million times worse xx

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Hello AFVFNC. There’s never a good time to lose a loved one but this current crisis really will exacerbate your loss and I feel for you, truly I do. Your loss is so recent, so very raw and I understand your need for company and support. There are many wonderful people on this site who can offer you support. If you need to talk then you just talk away. We’re listening. We understand. Sending love and strength xx

The same goes for you Alex. I’m sorry you have a need for this site and yet I’m so glad you’ve found it. Explore it, read old threads because there are some great posts from people who are now infrequent on here. I and many others, write journals to our loved ones. In it I chat to my husband, tell him all that’s happening. I have found it to be a good source of comfort. If you like poetry, there is a ‘Grieving through Poetry’ thread with some amazing stuff on it. I have found poetry to be another source of comfort. It’s been 2 years and 9 months since I lost my wonderful man and over time I have developed coping strategies. Grief cannot be rushed. Sending you love and strength Alex. xx

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Thank you so so much I’m getting it from everyone just now I don’t feel safe my whole world has been tipped upside down xx

I understand Alex, about your world being tipped upside down. It goes without saying as we have lost the one person who made our world safe, happy and joyous. Given time, your world will slowly get back up the right way but I’m afraid to say, it will always be somewhat off kilter. That’s not to say we can never enjoy life again because we can, I do. It’s just a different enjoyment. I laugh, I sing, I dance (usually with a photo of my husband :blush:). You will too one day but you can’t rush grief so one day at a time Alex, just one day at a time. Don’t expect too much of yourself. Much love xx

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Thank you not only am I dealing with my grief I’m getting it from his family aswell I won’t go into detail on here but I feel I’m having a breakdown I really do I can’t see a way out :sweat::sweat::sweat:

Hi there, my wife is getting cremated next week and because of this virus her friends and family can’t support me. This is going to be so hard.

I feel for you, I really do. I have no idea what advice is being given to you by the funeral services but in my experience they are very helpful. Our parish clergy were also a hugh support. You can always have a memorial service at a later stage. We’re living in very unusual times. Xx

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Hi there. Sorry I’m going off track a bit here and equally sorry you are upset at people being out and about but I think people are on track but the guidelines are:
We are allowed to go out for exercise, shopping, medical reasons and work. So there will be people carrying on with their lives and not shutting themselves away completely. We must all keep that two metre distance between each other however and obviously keep to the hygiene instructions.
I go out with my dogs and chat to other dog owners from a distance. I have an allotment which the government have stated that will stay open, We keep to the distance and hygiene rules there also.
The local supermarket still has a full carpark most days. Not sure why people are still rushing to do so much shopping but living on my own will have no alternative but to go there when I need. I don’t wish or need to shop on line at present but doubt I would get a delivery anyway. Otherwise I stay in my house or garden as instructed and still feel I am self isolating but to be honest not a lot different to the norm, except I can’t see family.
Take care

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Hi pat,
Yes you’re right about the rules, I still go out for a walk and I take my daughter to work as she works in a pharmacy, it’s definitely quieter out, I think the rules have sunk in to people now, just at first it was confusing for everyone.
I used to have dogs, I do miss walking them , just have cats now.
It’s good that you can still go to your allotment, especially as you enjoy it.
It’s hard not being able to see family, but thank goodness for video chat.
Steph x

Hi Sven,
Sorry to hear about your mum and dad, it must be so hard to see them not well.
Where does the time go! I know what you mean about when you look at them it’s hard to believe that everything’s changed so much, and remembering how they used to be. It is sad how life is, when you’re young you never think that our mum and dad are going to grow old, and we always think we’re invincible.
I’ve been ok, keeping busy, I’ve got my daughter with me so not completely on my own. I’m missing my other daughters and grandchildren, we are video chatting, but not the same .
Been trying to do some jobs around the house, funny, sometimes I feel I can do so much and others I just can’t get motivated.
Look after yourself x

Hi Steph
Been at the supermarket nearby and a lot more people are wearing masks and keeping to 2 metres apart in queues etc. It does feel a bit dystopian. We dont have a lot of empty shelves just now which is good. I know being alone in the house can send your mind to dark places. I am still not motivated and sleeping a lot or try to. Its the main relief. Are you managing to stay on top of things? It has been cold but sunny and i see some people venturing into their gardens to do a bit of work. I dont have the heart for anything yet just hoping to feel different at some point though cant imagine it. Hope you are getting through Steph. Keep cosy x

Hi Pam,
It’s very strange at the moment, the supermarkets seem quieter now, hardest thing is not being able to cuddle my grandchildren. My youngest granddaughter is coming up to her first birthday in April, it’s going to be so hard not being there, and she’s nearly walking .
I feel for everyone on here , life is hard for us anyway without all this.
It’s cold here too, had frosty nights, but nice sunny days.
Take care x

Thank you for your kind words. Cathy was cremated yesterday, and only five allowed at the Crematorium. Very hard day with no family support. The music played was………


Beautiful music: heart rending in many ways, but there’s a breath of life in there too. Perhaps having that breath will let you have memories that are celebrations of your life together. I can imagine what a bloody hard day it must have been. Keep coming back here, especially when things are overwhelming. Blokes need hugs too so here’s hugs at you. Take care. My thoughts are very much with you.