It is almost 12 months since I lost my husband. He always insisted he didn’t want a funeral . We are at a loss as what to do with his ashes as he gave us no idea. He didn’t have a favourite place that we know of. The family feel it is now time to lay him to rest. Can you give us some suggestions please.

Can’t offer any suggestions but my husbands ashes are staying with me until I go then I’m being buried and he’s coming in with me x


I will keep my husband’s ashes until mine can be with his.

1 Like

@Barb26 I have half of paulines ashes at home with me the other half are going back to Ireland to go with her mum and dad and when I go I will be cremated and my ashes will go in with hers

I have bought a plot, which l will go in as well, l said a poem he loved, l feel he is at peace now
I can go wherever l want, you need clouser hun, hope this helps you
I am here if you need me xxx​:pray::pray:

Dear Barb26

We never discussed my husband’s ashes but I always indicated the place where I wanted to have my own so that is where we took them. Beautiful beach where we spent many family holidays.

You must do what you feel is right for you not others. As some have said on this forum they are keeping them until it is also their time. Do not be pressurised into making a decision until you are certain.

Certainly for me personally I never thought I would have to be making these decisions at this point. I thought I had years ahead.

Thinking of you.

Hi Barb
We approached the local church, you are entitled to a plot if it is your church, you don’t have to purchase. We wanted somewhere to bury the ashes and to visit. I have just planted a load of crocuses around the urn and headstone so it should flower in spring. It’s a hard decision to make don’t be rushed, do what’s best for you so have a good think about it. Take care x

My husband always wanted his ashes scattered in the Grand Canyon, however is been recently made illegal to scatter them there now, so I am at a loss what to do. I have to collect his ashes next week and am dreading it, But will just hold on to them until I decide x

I have my husbands ashes at home. We both agreed that when the time comes we will be scattered together in our favourite place. It helps me to know that he is still with me.

Take care

1 Like

I’m keep the ashes in the house. They are tucked away, but it’s a comfort knowing they are close by. I think I’d be more alarmed, if they were outside.


I have my daughters ashes here at home. I bought a lovely pot from the garden centre and she is buried in that in my garden with lovely plants on top and an Angels Wings plant next to her

1 Like

Hi Barb,
I picked up my partner’s ashes last week, after being unsure as to what to do with them. I have felt great comfort knowing that she is home with me and this is where she will now stay. She always loved being at home together with me and our boys. I now feel at peace knowing we are all together again. I hope the solution will come to you, bless you x


What a lovely idea Jude. I can’t decide what to do with my husband’s ashes & the thought of him being in the garden at home where he loved & close to me sounds lovely. Thank you xx

We scattered my dad’s ashes on his birthday in a lovely spot on our local golf course’s land, on the edge of the moors, with their permission, where my mum and dad regularly walked. We have a hand carved stone there in a dry stone wall with his name on and take flowers. There is the most beautiful view from there. He is under an ash tree, which is quite symbolic and healing. We never feel down after going there and know he has many people passing by, saying hello to him as they do. It felt the right thing to do for him and mum wishes to be scattered there with him one day. We see it as him being back with nature. I would highly recommend looking into something like this, on private land in a nice spot, if it is an option for you. I’m so sorry you are having to do it and my thoughts are with you.

Was perfect for me too, she loved to be in the garden and so do I, I felt a great sense of peace that she was home where she belonged