Awful, crippling grief.

Hi all,

Can’t even begin to explain how I feel. I feel so lost without my husband. He was my everything. I cannot stop crying. Day in, day out - I’m in so much pain. I physically hurt and cannot envision my future anymore. I don’t know what to do with my life now that I don’t have him here. I have no one. He is always on my mind and I cannot seem to stop. I am trying so hard to be who I once was for the sake of my two daughters yet nothing is working. Without him I am nothing. I’m so alone.


Hi Jackie33 I’m sorry for your loss and how you are feeling please know that you’re not alone we’re all going through the same emotional rollercoaster at losing our better half, life is cruel and grief relentless, hopefully you have support and be kind to yourself, we’re walking together holding each other up, sending love and hugs xx

1 Like

So very sorry Jackie. It’s a dreadful, physical pain like you say.

It’s very hard to imagine a future without our dear husbands, but I’m nearly one year on from losing my darling and I have to say the “future” just happens.

I don’t know how I arrived at this point one year on.

At the time it happened I never ever thought I’d get here.

But here I am.

All we can do is take an hour at a time, those hours turn into days. The days into months…

It isn’t easy to live without them, but we have to don’t we?

Your daughters need you, and you need them.

You aren’t alone. We know how bad you feel. We do understand.

I know it’s not much, but we care because we’re going through the same thing.

Much love, Janey xx


Hiya Jackie its 14 month since my husband died I have being were you it does get a little easier I cry at least once a day but not all day like I did at the beginning take care love annie x

1 Like

Janie my husband died on the 13/04/21 suddenly and you are right I don’t know how we manage to go on but we do - it is painful from that awful moment when you realise your husband has gone - there is no future -there is no happiness- what an awful mess we were all in - I know at the time if only I could have gone with him - somehow I have ended up here today I don’t know how but I am functioning - I am not happy but I am here - I do what I have to do - I eat, sleep and help my family as much as I can. I don’t expect much but a sort of acceptance of my situation- I still think of myself as being married and I cherish the thoughts of being his wife for 51 happy years - I know I have to carry on but I think of him being with me in spirit and helping me through this time until it is my turn and we can be together again. x take care everyone your not alone.x

1 Like

Sanbay you are still married and always will be to person you loved I had a thought a friend said your no longer married when my john died refuse to speak to her know lv annie x x

1 Like

I do feel married Annie and I hope I always will x

1 Like

You are and you always will be lv annie x

1 Like

I often re-post the following which I read a while back. It’s so spot on. I couldn’t have said it better.

"The death of a spouse or partner is different
than other losses, in the sense that it literally
changes every single thing in your world
going forward. When your spouse dies, the
way you eat changes. The way you watch TV
changes. Your friend circle changes (or
disappears entirely.) Your family dynamic/life
changes (or disappears entirely). Your
financial status changes. Your job situation
changes. It effects your self-worth. Your self-
esteem. Your confidence. Your rhythms. The
way you breathe. Your mentality. Your brain
function. (Ever heard the term ‘widow brain?’
If you don’t know what that is, count yourself
as very lucky.) Your physical body. Your
hobbies and interests. Your sense of security.
Your sense of humor. Your sense of
womanhood or manhood. EVERY. SINGLE.
THING. CHANGES. You are handed a new life
that you never asked for and that you don’t
particularly want. It is the hardest, most gut-
wrenching, horrific, life-altering of things to live with.”