Being blamed for my father’s death

My father died of a massive stoke and heart attack after an argument with me. I know that it wasn’t purely down to me. He was massively overweight, had angina (which I only 4 years later found out about…. And was on statins). At the time I was going through a very domestically abusive relationship and was begging for help out of it (which he didn’t want to do - couldn’t do I found out later on - because in spite of being raised in a wealthy family he was broke but never told anyone. ) I was desperate for his help and I argued with him and he died. I donated his organs in ICU. My mother and brother have blamed me ever since. I don’t blame myself but I do miss him and forgive him for numerous things, but I feel I can’t grieve when I’m being held responsible for his death.


Hello @Dino,

I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your father. It sounds as though things are very tough at the moment and you are struggling to deal with your grief.

I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you are feeling here and I hope that you find the community a good source of support. Everyone here has experienced the loss of a loved one and will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help you right now.

Take care - keep reaching out,