I know that in the modern age, it’s common for people to believe that when we’re dead, we’re dead. I had almost decided on that too, but my husband’s death nearly two years ago was a game-changer. I’m sceptical, and I knew that I could easily be prone to wishful thinking, but I decided to undertake some research into an afterlife. I’m so glad I did, because, while I encountered a lot of nonsense, some of it was not so easy to dismiss, and I now feel reasonably assured that Ken’s soul survived physical death, and waits for me when I go. It hasn’t necessarily made missing him physically any less hellish, but it has certainly helped in other ways. I believe that Ken is with me in a very real sense, not just “in my heart”, as the sympathy cards say.
Of course I would never dream of saying to any bereaved person “You know he’s still with you,” without asking them first what their perspective is on such things, and seeing if they’re open to discussion.
For anybody who is interested in probing the question of an afterlife further, I urge you to Google the “Love Knows No Death” workbook, by Dr. Piero Calvi-Parisetti. It’s designed to help ground grieving people in some of the strong evidence that exists for an afterlife. $10 for the pdf.
Would love anybody’s thoughts. Can I just ask that people be gentle, and not call me an idiot regardless of their belief or lack thereof? This has helped me survive. xo
Hi Mrs Plummer, I lost my husband very suddenly on 29th December 2016 so I am 21 months in. I still talk to Nigel every single day, tell him about my day at work and what the family is up to. I believe he is still around us and he continues to be the huge part of this family that he was while he was here on this earth and he always will be until the time comes for us to be together again. Like you it doesn’t mean that I don’t have days where I really don’t think I can do this on my own and I miss him so so much, then maybe a little sign will appear and we carry on again. Yesterday a white feather landed on our grandson ( Nigel never got to meet him ) in his pram whilst my daughter was out walking and she also finds great comfort as she says knowing her dad knows about her baby. Everyone has their own beliefs and have to do what ever they can to get through each day. I would be very interested to know what you discovered in your research and will definitely google the workbook “Love knows no Death”
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and take care of yourself,
Jackie
I’m with you Mrs Plummer. I too am sceptical by nature but since losing my wonderful husband I have delved into all manner of books and I agree there is some rubbish out there and certain people ready to take advantage of the vulnerable grieving such as ourselves. However, having said that there are some wonderful books ready to bring comfort and reassurance that our loved ones are with us and waiting for us in another life. I did visit a medium a few months after David’s death and oh my goodness, it was so emotional and the things she told me were frankly things she could never have guessed or known about. Again I went there as a sceptic but came out a believer. It has brought me enormous comfort but I accept it’s not for everyone. I have told very few people of my visit for fear of negative responses and being called gullible and silly. So no, I don’t think you’re an idiot Mrs Plummer. What I do think is that you’re an excellent writer with a very open mind. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and starting this conversation. Have you read Proof of Heaven by Eban Alexander? He is a scientist and neurosurgeon so should be a sceptic by the very nature of it but his personal experience tells a story. Much love xx
good evening Mrs Plummer,
firstly i am very sorry to hear of the loss of your husband and send you a gentle heart felt hugg.
i truly beleive that once a loved one dies and after we have said our goodbyes we start a new phase in our lives and become researchers of the after-life. after the death of my father some years ago and then the premature death of my son oliver 5 months into my pregnancy in march 2011, i find that there are too many positives of proof of an after life than negatives. I say this because at times i feel my father pops solutions into my head if im working a project on the small holding and sometimes its a certain smell or even just the feeling that he stands with me when i feel sad. i never feel scared at the thought of him being there, i only wish i could see him rather than only sense him, i also hope that he is with my son Oliver xx.
Hi Mrs Plummer I love what you said in your post,my lovely husband died on 15th March this year and I miss him terribly,but I have a strong belief in the afterlife,i always sensed something after I lost my mam and dad over 20 years ago,i was given signs then,but since losing my husband he was 59yrs and we were married for 35 years there have been many signs,robins on our wedding anniversary,feathers,tingles ,taps on the head when no one else there,whispers,my three daughters have had many signs too,there has been signs most weeks for the last 7 months and we are still getting them,so I personally know what you mean and I find a lot of hope and comfort from it all,my middle daughter heard her father speak to her and my 3 year old granddaughter has said many things that she says granda tells her to say,there are too many signs to mention here but in my heart I know he is with me,i like you would never impose my beliefs on anyone,i understand its very personal but I have met many lately who believe too as they have experienced amazing things themselves.It certainly does not heal grief we feel for our loved ones but it softens the raw pain of it for me knowing we go on .x
Hi Mrs Plummer
My Mum passed 14 months ago and I’m always saying ‘I wish I knew she was ok’
I’m very much of a seeing is believing person but all of me really hopes she is ok and carrying on ‘up there’ with her dad and best friend.
I wish I knew, but I talk to my beloved every day. Her grave is only 200 yards from home, I could see it if it were not for a farmyard wall, and I stand by her side daily. If I didn’t talk to her, I would just weep, so I guess that I must surely believe in an afterlife.
Hi i believe in the after life my reasons are this …When my darling Denise was alive we used to go to our local Morrisons ,which used to be an army barracks ,in 1 corner Denise used to see soldiers lined up .Also in hospitals she used to see dead people walikng around.Going to see a medium if they charge i wouldnt go see ,because its a gift they been given .I went to my local church a free medium came to my house ,who didnt know Denise or i and told me Denise was grounded at our house ,but wanted to be with her mum ,so i had to give her my blessing to go because she wanted to be with her mum(whod passed several years ealier.)Before the medium came, at times id go out switch all the lights off and come back to the kitchen light on ,also id here footsteps upstairs when i was alone downstairs Colin
I had a visitor yesterday and when he was leaving he stopped at the door, turned to me and said, “Remember, nowhere also spells now here!” It took me completely by surprise, I can’t stop thinking about it. Xx
Words are so thought provoking, aren’t they? I can’t get enough of them these days, whether it be prose or poetry. I’ve always enjoyed the written word but since losing my husband, well it’s taken me to a whole new level. Plus it brings me some comfort and something to hold on to. Thank you Amelie’sgran for more thought provoking words. With love xx
I too read lots of books on the afterlife after my lovely husband died in June 2020 and i believe he is still around me. I recently came across a You Tube video that I found most comforting. The link is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktzCVs4iFpA
I hope this may help some one to feel calmer.
My lifelong partner passed away 2 months ago, ever since I’ve been reading a lot about things like reincarnation (there was a research in which 2500 children with past life regression memories were studied), NDE and neuroscience topics (like ‘Are we just our brains?’).
There are still so many things in our universe and indeed also the human mind that scientists can’t fully explain… Quantum Physics may provide some insights but it’s a relatively new field of science.
I have watched some interviews of Eben Alexander and his experience is indeed fascinating.
People don’t really talk about death and afterlife until they experience what we are going through, it’s only natural for us to want to find out more about what happened to our loved ones…
Thank you for starting this thread and I am glad you feel the ‘presence’ of Ken.
