Brother died

My brother died recently, but now all of my siblings have gone, all 3 dying quite young along with my parents, I am just grateful for my children and grandchildren. I am so upset but I’m feeling guilty about being upset as my sister in law has lost her husband who she was looking forward to spending a happy life together, I don’t know how to get over the guilt I’m feeling.

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Hello @Lee11,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your brother. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,


Hi, I know how you feel, sorry for your loss, it’s so hard to not feel guilty, iam having a bad day today lost my brother 8 months ago now my sister 9 years ago, both very young, it’s not easy to talk to people sometimes just have to take each day as it comes not sure how long this is going to take, I have never felt alone like this when my sister died but my brothers passing was so unexpected. I do hope you can start to feel better soon, loosing a sibling seems harder than loosing a parent sending you support

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Hi, Thank you for your reply, like you say it isn’t easy to talk to people, now we’ve had the funeral I’m sure people are thinking it’s okay that’s done and dusted, but myself and my sister in law are finding it hard especially for her as he’s never coming home and we also have to wait for an inquest. it was hard losing my parents and my other siblings but as he was my last and youngest brother it seems hardest of all.
Sending you support as well and thinking of others going through loss xx


Lee 11
Yes i had a lot of support up until the funeral ,then i think people think thats it ,but sadly thats just the beginning take care of yourself


Hi, it’s nearly a year since we lost our brother very suddenly and unexpectedly, he was only 58. As you know life is very hard and at the time everything seems impossible and you wonder how you will get through. People tell you life will get easier but you wonder how after such a devastating loss. The world keeps turning and life goes on. You probably feel disconnected from life and just stumbling through. Keep their memory alive, talk about them often and remember the special times you had together.


Thank you so much for your message! I’m so sorry for your loss and do appreciate your sharing your experience here.
My brother is dying, my older sister died a year ago and I’m now the oldest in my family, with one younger sibling alive. I feel like I’m losing the ‘roof’ over my head. My parents are gone, my best friend died 3 years ago and my dog a year ago. Thank you for the reminder to appreciate my children and grandkids.
And thank you for saying you feel lost and stumbling around in life. I feel so similar and wonder if I’ll ever feel grounded again.

Hi, Thank you for your reply. Sorry for your loss, my brother was the same age, it is so tough at the moment trying to be more positive and I know I will eventually learn to live with this.
Take care.

Hi, Thank you for your reply.
I am so sorry you are going through this, the only thing I can say at the moment is cherish your children and grandkids.
Sending a virtual hug.

Hi, I am sorry to hear how painful your life has been . Cherish every single moment you still have your brother. We wonder how we still survive with the way life treats us but we have to realise tomorrow is another day and we have to be thankful for all the little things we take for granted and live life to the full. Love to you and be kind to yourself.

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