There’s a part of the grieving process,
where your soul kind of leaves your body too.
As though it’s off searching for the one you lost,
somewhere in the ether.
You walk around,
doing all the right things,
putting one foot in front of the other,
living,
but it’s really as though you’re the ghost.
Perhaps you are.
Perhaps your soul searches,
until you find the one you miss,
and they tell you to go back and live.
So, when that numbness passes brave one,
maybe it’s time to do what you are told,
go back and live,
twice as hard.
You don’t belong there in the ether,
nor do you need to search for the one you lost,
they find you.
And when they do,
Thank you so much for sharing this with the community I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.
@AlysonandSteve Just read your post, I think it sums up what a lot of us feel, and experience. Are things any easier for you now, be good to hear how you are coping Much Love xx,
@AlysonandSteve So sorry to hear things are no easier, I hope you are getting some support from counselling? I had a lot of anxiety in the first few months which was related to PTSD as my husband also died suddenly. Counselling and therapy helped me manage this. I haven’t experienced fear, but it is a natural part of grief, we have lost our anchor, not knowing who we are or where we’re going or sometimes where we live. This all takes time for our brains to rewire. @Ali29 posted a really helpful narrative of how our neural pathways in our brain have to learn to rewire when we lose someone significant, and this takes time. You are doing amazingly well by talking and sharing on here, and hopefully seeking support from your GP and counselling. it’s still small steps, and we are here when you need xxx
@AlysonandSteve I am so sorry you are stuck in this void of grief. It is exhausting and I can hear that right now you don’t have the will to try anyone. What can we do to best support you here? Love and hugs xxx
@AlysonandSteve You are doing all the things you can and that’s important. I am sure your counsellor would have said there is no timeline on grief, it takes as long as it does to feel able to slowly move forward. Perhaps your family feel helpless seeing you in such distress. Often, they don’t know what to say or do and just want you to feel better. Have you spoken with your counsellor about your fear, if so, what strategies have they given you to try and help? Keep reaching out, you are needed and we are here to give support. xxx