My wife died suddenly 2 weeks ago. In a week’s time she is being buried. Since she died, I’ve made sure she has kept her wedding and engagement rings on, her favourite necklace and earrings, that she always wore. My MIL thinks she shouldn’t be buried with them as they could become something passed down to my daughter’s and their children. My instinct is telling me, no, they are my wife’s and a symbol of who she was and our love but now after my conversation with my MIL, I am worrying that I will regret it after the funeral and it is too late. I don’t know what to do.
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@Spence26 im sorry about your wife and I have felt the dilemma you are feeling
Could you keep some of your wife’s jewellery and leave some of it with her to be buried with? I think what’s most important is you do what’s the best for you.
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My worry would be that the undertaker would “lose” the rings and necklace and they end up in a pawn shop.
Given recent stories re: funeral parlours it wouldn’t be beyond the pale.
I agree with your MIL
To each their own.
Also, I’m sorry for your loss.
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I just feel that our wedding ring is an ever lasting sign of our love. I just want that with her always. But now I’m so worried that suddenly I will change my mind and it will be too late. I guess.its the finality of it Vs the idea of us being connected forever. I know it’s jewellery and our marriage was more than that but she loved.her rings.
She won’t see them .
You will, as will your children.
But as bluebell said, you must do what’s right for you.
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I had everything chosen to go with him but a few days before I changed my mind, they meant too much to lose and I’ve never regretted it (wedding ring got cut off 6 months previous as it was to small it was replaced with a ring tattoo so I didn’t have to make that decision)
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Thank you for sharing your experience. I’m thinking I’m more likely to regret not having the rings than having them, it’s just hard imagining her without them… I know it sounds odd but I hate the fact we are not together and she’s alone.
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Hi Spence
Sorry for your loss
My Brother lost his wife and Made the choice to have his wife and her jewellery buried with her
When my Mum passed away in September my Brother said to have my Mums rings because he regretted not keeping her rings and giving them to his daughters
But you do what is right for you
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Thank you. It’s definitely helpful hearing from people who had a similar dilemma.
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@Spence26
Wedding rings are a symbol of eternal love for each other and this was your ring to her declaring that, so in my opinion it should remain with her but trust your gut instinct on what feels right for you. A part of us dies with them so why not the ring?
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Throughout history we have been burying our loved ones in their jewellery. If your wife were being cremated I would suggest taking them off before the coffin is closed for the last time. But as she is being buried, they will stay with her and not melt away. Does she have other jewellery that might be passed to your daughters? Go with your feelings and don’t be swayed by your MIL, this isn’t her call.
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I have my parent’s wedding rings on a chain around my neck and finding comfort having them close to me.
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When I cremated my wife I put in with her a picture of us at our wedding, a linen handkerchief containing confetti from our wedding, 2 coins for the ferryman, a small bar of her favourite chocolate, and a small box of Ribena, because she hadn’t eaten for 6 weeks, and hadn’t drunk anything but water for a week before her death.
All the jewellery is with me.
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What thoughtful items to give your wife for her final journey, @Blake.
I also put a picture of the two of us in Steve’s coffin, along with our first anniversary card I’d given him and I put letters from me in his jacket pocket.
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When my wife was cremated 2 weeks ago , I wanted her to have her rings on ( as she never took them off no matter what ) , the funeral director said that’s fine she can be cremated with them on but the gold won’t turn to ash and will simply melt , then it is separate from the ash and sold with the money going to charity . So we had the funeral director take the rings off right before the cremation and will keep them with her ashes in the urn .
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When my dad was cremated I put a note in his pocket telling him how much I loved him.
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I’m so sorry for your loss. My husband died nearly a month ago, and I had the same dilemma. The only jewellery he ever wore was his wedding ring, and I decided to keep it and wear it as a keepsake, as it is a constant reminder of our love which he wore for 25 years. I also hate the idea that he’s not here.
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When my mum died years ago, I felt I had no right to her wedding and engagement rings, as they were symbols of the special love between her and my father, so they were cremated with her. But you must do what feels right and proper to you, and so whatever you decide to do will be the right decision.
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How about something like this? I got mine from the morgue, the little heart is in my micks hand and I’ve got the key ring part 
I agree with everyone else though it’s upto you 
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I have left her wedding ring on her but kept the necklace she always wore and her engagement ring. It was really hard to decide as she loved her engagement ring.
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