Hi everyone. I lost my mom unexpectedly to sepsis three weeks ago tomorrow and it is getting worse everyday.
She had underlying cancer that was doing well and I gave up my life to care for her since 2019. Not only did I work from home and be with her 24/7 but we were also the genuine best of friends, each others everything, travelled together, laughed together, cried together.
Losing her has devastated me so much I just don’t feel I can go on. I gave up my friends, partner, anything of my own to care for her as people just didn’t understand how much time and work it takes caring to that level.
I am only in my 30s and have no family, no parents and no friends.
Her funeral is next week and I just find myself wishing it was mine too as I cannot see a way through the pain.
If anyone can help me from their own experiences, I’d be very grateful as I am struggling more than I can even say.
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my dad 18days ago and he too was my best friend. He was not ill in anyway and died extremely suddenly the day after we got home from holiday. I felt like he gave my life purpose. I too am in my 30s and can’t help but feel robbed of the time I should have had with him. His funeral is coming up soon and it fills me with dread.
I am so sorry you are on your own, I can’t imagine how painful that must be. Could you maybe look to see if there are any bereavement support groups in your area? Or maybe speak to your GP to see if they can support you with counselling?
Just know that you are not alone in your feelings. If I have learnt anything from this group it is that grief is slow and unpredictable. Take a day at a time and grieve how you need.
Hi Louise I am so very sorry for your loss and the difficult situation you now find yourself in. I saw your post and just wanted to send you a hug so I created an account. I too have lost my mum very suddenly, I’m a little bit ahead of you at 13 and 1/2 weeks. One step at a time and breathe has been my mantra. I don’t have any magic words but I liken this reality to being on a rollercoaster and I frequently remind myself that I’m human and whatever I’m feeling is ok even when it feels utterly unbearable. I’m sad to read you have no one at all to turn to. The Samaritans are excellent to speak to. My faith is helping me and forgive me if it’s in appropriate but could you consider calling into your local church? Prioritise sleep, eating , rest and some movement in the day. If you don’t have a pet could you consider a dog or cat- great company and comfort. Speaking of which buy yourself a super soft blanket or cuddly toy or both for comfort. Be kind to yourself hugs xxxx
Hi Louise,
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my mum in late July & the pain at times has been unbearable. I have spent many days in bed & have retreated from the world. Some days I’m exhausted just from the crying.
We love so powerfully & deeply & so our losses have impacted us greatly.
All you can do is take each day at a time. Minute by minute, hour by hour. Try to eat everyday. Try to take some self care.
If you have no other family or friends to talk to then post on here as we are all trying to find a way through our loss.
Most importantly are not alone.