I’m so sorry to hear that you lost your mum at such a young age and that you are having bad dreams about her again. Unfortunately, trying to push grief away or avoid it can make you feel worse in the long run. It’s really important to have outlets for your feelings and somewhere to talk about it. It’s never too late to start getting support, and I’m glad you’ve taken the first step of writing things down here.
There are many other people on this site who have lost a parent and, although most of them are older than you, they will understand some of what you are going through. You should get some supportive replies from some of them soon.
In the meantime, you might also be interested to read and reply to this conversation where you can find @Tt951, who is only a few years older than you, and @DanM11, who lost his dad when he was 12: 24yrs old… My dad died infront of me before Christmas
As well as posting here, these are some other good places to get support:
- Grief Encounter offers bereavement support for young people, including online chat, email support and online counselling.
- The charity Winston’s Wish runs a Facebook group for Adults Bereaved as Children.