I lost my partner at the end of November suddenly, she was my whole world & we literally did everything together. I don’t want to live this life without her the only reason I’m still here is because I have a mother that wouldn’t be able to live without me, she’s got mental health issues of her own & she’s the only person I’ve really got to go to. My partner was the one who brought the income in & now I’m in a situation where I could lose my house & everything I’ve got. I really don’t want to be here anymore with all this pain.
Emz, it is still very early days. The initial shock of losing your partner is only just beginning to wear off as you now face your journey coming to terms with your life turned upside down. I’m 16 months in and I’m only just understanding that actually I’m a different person to what I was before and that the life I thought I would have with my husband in the future is gone. I’m still trying to find my direction, grief still hits in a tsunami of pain, devastation and chaos but I have found that I am learning to adjust and that I have survived the waves of grief since he died and will continue to do so. I have accepted that grief is messy, painful but has to be felt in order to heal. I try to find moments of comfort and peace when I can take refuge and gather strength to continue. My wish for you is that as time goes on you will start to resurface and find your way through. The pain of losing your partner, the fear of not knowing what lies ahead for you and the need to support your mother weighs heavily on you. I don’t have any answers, all I can do is listen, witness your pain and let you know that things change over time. You don’t get over your grief but I hope eventually you can grow round it so that it becomes part of the new you. Sending you a virtual hug. Take care.
Thank you Jjbee, it just seems to have hit me like brick again this week! You take care too x
Let the grief come it feels awful, painful every moment is one more you have got through. The financial issues are so difficult especially when your head is all over the place. Take things one step at a time.
I am still at the beginning of my journey without my soul mate it is the hardest thing I have every done but I owe it to our love and life to carry on. I try to be positive. I go for a walk with tears streaming down my face but I am out, walking, feeling the wind, rain, sun what ever the day sends. I find this helps rather than just sitting.
I wish you some peace but I know it is hard.
You are not alone people are here for you
I’m so sorry to hear about your partner.
It sounds like you’re looking for support and I’m glad that you’ve been able to talk about how you’re feeling here. There is lots of other support out there, and I would really encourage you to reach out and speak to someone about how you are feeling.
samaritans.org are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.
giveusashout.org are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text SHOUT to 85258 and talk to them about anything.
You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.
We have also recently launched a Grief Self-Help Service, which provides articles and interactive tools to help you cope with grief. If you’re interested in understanding more about grief and how you can manage it, please visit https://griefguide.sueryder.org/.
Please do take a look at these services and also keep reaching out here on the community for support whenever you may need it.