Chapel of Rest

Losing a partner
1

I’ve just been to see my boyfriend in the Chapel of Rest. I went in to do his hair, I shaved the sides of his head then french plaited his dreadlocks, one last plait for him. I sat with him stroked him, talked to him and cried for him.

It was the first time I’d seen him since he died on the 20th January. Nothing prepares you seeing a loved one laid out to rest. Before I saw him I kept expecting him to turn up, but now I’ve seen him I know that will never happen.
I felt a sense of peace once I’d seen him.

I miss him so so much. He didn’t deserve to die, I feel utterly lost, I don’t know what to do with myself. I didn’t want to leave him today, i could have stayed with him all day just stroking his hair…why is life so cruel?

He didn’t look like he should, his smile was all wrong, he had the most beautiful smile that showed his teeth. He was always happy, nothing fazed him and he was funny, he made friends everywhere he went, a real character.

One day at a time but today’s been tough x

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2

I didnt get comfort from seeing my partner in the chapel of rest. He didn’t look like him?
I luckily only spent a minute or two in there so it isn’t an image that has stuck in my head.
I know some people use it for closure and i hope your experience helped you with this x

3

It’s so hard to do. I went to see my husband just once in the chapel of rest and it broke me. I couldn’t go again as I couldn’t face keeping saying goodbye then I felt guilty because he was all alone. There is no right or wrong

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4

I get that about him being alone i worried about that alot.

5

I understand the guilt feeling because I felt it too. I don’t like to think of him being alone or cold. He didn’t look like him either, but for me it was a massive comfort to see him.
I’ve dealt with death before and sadly my boyfriend wasn’t the first dead body I’ve seen. But it doesn’t stop it being any less harder x